Carpe Diem

...learning to do nothing.

2012-01-29T15:06:00.000-08:00

There's a phenomenon in the US. We don't know how to 'do nothing' without feeling like failures - or at least I don't know how to. I still feel like I need to be productive, to have some tangible evidence of what I did in a day. More often than not these days I don't have any evidence I've been productive and that can be a little nerve wracking. But I'm learning.

I'm at my friend Inci's house in Izmir. We spend the evenings with the family; mom, dad, little brother, and any relatives that happen to be at the house that day. They heat the living room with a wood stove, the rest of the house is freezing, so we all huddle in the warmth. The TV is always on, not something I love, but something I'm learning to Ignore. I can give it a small amount of credit for helping me understand Turkish. I am starting to understand more of the conversation and starting to chime in a little more; although I still speak less than I know. It's good that the only person speaking English is my friend Inci, while the rest of the family only knows Turkish.

We stay up until 2am most nights. Talking, knitting, checking e-mails, watching movies, being with each other. We wake up between 10 and 12am sometimes leaving the house to do something, sometimes being together at home.

Spending time with family is a highly valued thing in Turkey. In the US it seems that being with family members is tolerable at most; I'm glad I don't personally feel that way.

I'm starting to unlearn my American habit of feeling guilty when I spend a day at home, being 'lazy' as it's been called. I'm eating dinner sitting around a table cloth on the floor of the living room, sharing dishes and forks with four people I met a few days ago. We're sharing laughs at my broken Turkish. They're helping me unlearn my American habit.

Do me a favor and take a minute to be with your family and friends; sit down together, and even if you're doing your different projects, feel each others energy there. It feels good.

...Izmir.

2012-01-26T01:03:00.000-08:00

I took the bus today (Tuesday) from Istanbul to Izmir.

I haven't been up this early since I've been living in Istanbul. I walked out of the metro into the cool morning air. I realized that I really miss the smell of morning air with it's feeling of newness; before it's polluted with the work of the day.

Not paying attention I got on the wrong service bus. Luckily my knowledge of Turkish is at the point where I could realize my mistake and get off the bus before it got too far.

I was lucky enough to buy a ticket on a double level bus and get the seat on the top level, very front, right side; the best seat if you ask me. The woman sitting beside me was large and dressed from head to toe. She greeted me in a raspy whisper, making sure I knew she was sick and proceeded to cough much of the ride. But I forgive her, she was a sweet woman.

A few hours into the ride we had a break from the stuffy bus to make a half hour ferry crossing. The weather was idillic, cold but fresh with blue skies in the distance. I sat outside watching Arabic and Turkish children throw bread to the birds while I sipped a salep - like eggnog but made from iris root powder, milk and sugar.

The remainder of the bus ride, all seven hours, it rained and I slept.

We arrived in Izmir and piled out of the bus. I inquired about the service bus (Inci instructed me previously to take the bus to Balçova) and the guy pointed down a ramp to a cluster of little, dirty buses. Another attendent pointed the way to the correct bus. I piled in with my backpack and bag, trying not to step on people. And then when there were only three seats open another five people got on the bus. We resorted to practically sitting on each other and when I asked the driver where I should get off for my stop the whole bus had a conversation about it. One of the women wanted my phone number. I get this quite often. People don't speak English but want my number. I made it to the correct place, the last person on the bus. They dropped me off on the street and a few minutes later my friend showed up. First time I've seen her in five years!

I am staying with her and her family. Lovely people.

More updates to come soon.

...living with the Turkish bureaucracy.

2012-01-16T10:02:00.000-08:00

Snow in Istanbul.

My tourist visa ends in 11 days. And today I finally got around to applying for an appointment to get my residency visa.

That's right, you heard me. I'm staying in Turkey. For a year. I decided (at least a month ago) that I love living here. And because I'm learning Turkish I want to focus, instead of studying for three months and then going back to Arabic and getting the two languages confused.

The visa application process isn't that straightforward. Everyone has different information to offer. I was pretty worried about applying in time and having everything come through okay. The last thing I want to do is get kicked out of the country.

My appointment is scheduled for March 8th at 4pm. I have almost two months to get everything together. Luckily I don't have too many things to get ready. One of the documents I have to present when I have my appointment is a bank statement saying I have enough of money on hand. The money however has to be in a Turkish bank.

I went to a bank today. I talked to a security man at the door and tried to explain what I needed. Finally he understood, gave me a slip of paper and told me to go upstairs. I sat down at the desk of a woman who, when she got off the phone, greeted me in English. I explained that I wanted to get a bank account. She asked for my passport and tax number... uh oh... what tax number? She gave me the address of the place to get a Turkish tax number and said to come back 24 hours later.

I knew the general area and figured I could ask someone where the exact location was. I wandered around for at least an hour, asking a different person every few minutes if they knew where this address was. No one knew. When I was at the bank I forgot to write down the name of the place.

I went back to the bank and spent ten minutes trying to explain to the security guard that I needed the name for the tax place, I already had the address, but that didn't help much. Finally I asked to talk to the same woman as before. He escorted me upstairs. She smiled and wrote down the name of the place.

I went back to the same area and asked someone where this place was. Turns out, I had walked by it at least three times already. By the time I got back it was closed.

I will go back tomorrow and get a Turkish tax number. Hopefully.

...craving sugar.

2012-01-08T06:03:00.000-08:00

I went for two years without eating sugar. Well, I don't think I made it the whole two years without ever having a bite of something sugar-coated. But to the best of my ability I abstained and ignored the addictive, sweet substance.

At the beginning of this summer I went through a transition period. I decided life was not about being perfect. I stopped working out, I started eating sugar again, and I started eating gluten again. I didn't go wild with it, but I made a conscious decision to live my life for me. And that meant not worrying about my weight for the purpose of appealing to other people.

The body image issue for women in this modern, media influenced world is heartbreaking. Bodies are really under appreciated. Walking, talking, eating, being, loving and living are not possible without these vessels. And we give ourselves so much grief by trying to fit into a cookie cutter mold created by a media that has only the interest of profit in mind.

I also truly believe that if we knew how to find clothing that fit our bodies we would all be a lot more accepting and happy abou them, but that's another topic for another post.

Back to sugar.

While I now allow myself to eat whatever I want I know in the back of my head that refined sugar is an addictive drug. It is devoid of nutrition and very damaging to the body in large quantities. If you want more on that note read Sugar Blues.

Because I am into health and wellbeing and don't eat sugar that much, my body really when I go overboard. I believe that every human body has a negative reaction to refined sugar but most of these reactions are ignored/not noticed because of the constant inundation bodies are subjected to; the symptoms become 'normal'.

Sugar is bad in the same way that alcohol is bad. If you consume a small to moderate amount of alcohol the body can handle it, but when you go overboard (and stay overboard) the body can no longer handle it and you start to see major problems.

I'm noticing that I have a tendency to go on tangents...

Living in Istanbul and traveling in general has me trying many new foods, desserts included. A lot of them are delicious and a lot of them are too sweet for my taste. But when I eat sugar I crave sugar more often. And lately with the dark, cold weather of winter and loneliness that is unavoidable sometimes in a new city, halfway across the world, I find myself reaching for the sweets more often than not.

It wasn't a problem in the beginning, I didn't notice any major side effects. But now my face has started to break out again. Nothing major but noticeable to me. And I know it is because my body is trying to deal with too much sugar. When I was not eating sugar at all one dessert would result in a pimple the next day. So while I don't want to stop eating anything sweet I would like to cut down on the sugar. Because I only have one body and I want to take care of it. (I also don't like zits.)

I had been wanting to try an Avocado Chocolate Mousse for at least a year. Finally, with the abundance of avocados in Turkey I made it the other day. It was fantastic! Chocolaty, and so rich that I barely could eat the my little bowl.

But today when the sweet craving hit I only had a very small avocado. Here is my newest invention - genius if you ask me.

I know it's blatantly obvious I'm no food photographer, or any type of photographer for that matter. But bear with me, the taste of this is worth it.

Avocado Banana Chocolate Mousse

This recipe leaves a lot of room for playing. I have a hard time following recipes and usually I just make up the dish as I go. Really this recipe has to be tried and tasted and made to your liking. Also, adding the banana makes this need less sweetener and makes it cheaper. I know how expensive avocados can be sometimes.

one avocado
one banana
about 2-4 Tbsp cocoa powder
about 1 Tbsp honey

1. Put the avocado and banana in the blender or Cuisinart (I mashed them with a fork because Turkish kitchens usually don't have either of the previously mentioned mixing machines) and blend until smooth.

2. Add the cocoa powder and honey and blend until fully incorporated.

3. Taste. If it needs any more cocoa powder or honey, add and blend again.

4. Transfer to a bowl, or multiple bowls (depending on how much you want to eat!) and refrigerate for minimum 20 minutes.

5. Top with whatever you want. I used pomegranate seeds for this one.

6. Enjoy!!

I had my landlady try a bite of this without telling her what it was made of (I don't think she would have tried it if she knew it had avocado in it). Her exclamation was, 'Erotic!' It's that good.

...a salad.

2012-01-06T10:46:00.000-08:00

I'm in the mood for cooking. However the house I currently live in only has an electric hotplate that doesn't regulate temperature. It makes it quite difficult and extremely slow.

The good news is I'm moving into a new house this month! I found a studio apartment in an inexpensive part of town and I'm so excited to live on my own. As much as I like the people I live with, I don't get enough alone time and the 'party house' isn't where I want to live. I will also have a kitchen that's more suitable for cooking and the space to do whatever I want.

Back to food...

I love food. I love cooking. I love eating with friends. And recently I have been frequenting foodgawker and tastespotting, two of my all time favorite websites. This has resulted in at least 20 new recipes I want to try. The only problem with websites like this is I get so inspired I can spend a whole day looking at recipes and not get around to cooking a thing.

Today however, I actually did cook something. As the lentils for my Lentils with Spinach and Goat Cheese recipe bubbled away on the stove I made a salad. And not just any salad. A pomegranate salad.

Salads are so simple. And fun, because you can put just about anything in a salad. And it's pretty hard to make a bad salad. (Unless you you try on purpose I guess...)

Here's what I put in mine:

rocket (as the salad green)
mint
avocado
pomegranate seeds
feta cheese (really something Turkish that's like feta cheese)
olive oil
pomegranate balsamic vinegar
salt

And then I ate it all...

Yay for good food!

...mutlu yillar.

2012-01-01T01:38:00.000-08:00

At about this time last year I was in the middle of studying Arabic at Edmonds Community College. I had the faint idea to travel in my mind. I wanted to travel through the Middle East, maybe live in Syria.
When school finished in the spring I started working and worked all summer. I learned to work with metal and blacksmith. Although when I look back on it, I didn't actually work that much.
And I did a lot of emotional changing. I started to really love myself. I stopped working out to have a perfect body that would please other people. I cooked and ate good food. I gained some weight and felt great about it.
And the day after my 19th birthday I left the part of the world I have called home.
I spent a month on my Grandma's farm in Pennsylvania getting to know relatives I had never met before. And then spent some weeks getting to know my cousin in New York City.
In mid-October I made my first solo international flight and had an interesting two weeks in London, a city where I knew no one.
My travel ideas changed everyday and when I finally arrived in Istanbul I had decided to stay for three months.
But here I am, living in Istanbul and getting ready to apply for a year long residency visa.

~~~~~~~~~~

Every year on New Years eve I get all contemplative and metaphorical. I try to make resolutions that I forget five days later. And I try to come up with the perfect day, the perfect party to go to, because I want the next year to be perfect.

But I've learned something this year...

There is no such thing as perfection; the only way to find perfection in this world is to recognize the beauty in imperfection. Every human being on this planet has flaws, struggles, and stories - beautiful moments and hard realities.

Today for me is just another day in my life. It is the beginning of a new year and the first day of the rest of my life. Just like yesterday and the day before.

Today is also extremely special. I am welcoming the new year in a country halfway across the world from where I was born. I am living on my own, writing my own story, learning a new language and seeing what the world has to offer me.

I have lived in Istanbul for two months and one day. This is the hardest thing I've ever done, learning to live in a foreign culture. I've felt lonely, tired, frustrated, and exceptionally joyful.

~~~~~~~~~~

And now I welcome in the new year. And I'll leave you with some quotes that I am going to keep in mind this year. Kind of a different version of a resolution; quotes that inspire and remind me to be me.

No language is just studied as an aid to other purposes. It will in fact better serve other purposes, philological or historical, when it is studied for love, for itself. -J. R. R. Tolkein

Establishing goals is all right if you don't let them deprive you of interesting detours. -Doug Larson

Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold. -Helen Keller

Never give up something that you can't go a day without thinking about. -Unknown

To begin, begin. -William Wordsworth

If you don't risk anything you risk even more. -Erica Jong

While I dance I cannot judge, I cannot hate, I cannot separate myself from life. I can only be joyful and whole. -Hans Bos

Those who think they have no time for healthy eating, will sooner or later have to find time for illness. -Edward Stanley

Your perception of reality is reality. -Colin Wright

Life is short.

Break the rules,

forgive quickly,

kiss slowly,

love truly,

laugh uncontrollably,

and never regret anything

that made you smile.

Have a safe and beautiful New Years!

...unusual Christmas.

2011-12-26T09:54:00.000-08:00

Me being cozy in the cold and feeling a little better.

Photo credit: Photo Booth.

Christmas eve was the first really cold day of the year. I even saw a few snow flakes as I walked home from the store where I bought sugar-scrub-making supplies.

And I must have eaten something funky in the evening....

... because I spent all of Christmas in bed....

Literally. From 12pm December 25th until 9:30am December 27th.

And that my friends, was Christmas. I'm feeling thankful at the moment that this is not such a huge holiday for me. Yes, it's nice to be with family and friends. To have hot beverages, and open presents. But there is no Christmas in Turkey... it's not a Muslim holiday. And that made this Sunday just another day of the year; only worth celebration in it's ordinary and therefore extraordinariness.

Truthfully I have not been feeling my best for the past two weeks. I have moved through a head cold, a cough and a complete emptying of my insides. I had hoped that would be the end of it. But now my breath is wheezing as try to focus on my Turkish homework.

... some things I am grateful for today...

*Listening to Sarah Brightman.
*Hot showers with homemade body scrub that makes my skin feel luscious and smell like cookies. (Recipe to come.)
*Lots of gawking time on craftgawker.

...yağmur yağıyor.

2011-12-23T08:12:00.000-08:00

I went to the balcony to capture the rain on camera.

It was already dark.

The most intense rain and wind I've ever seen. Blowing sideways. Finally cold enough to make me want gloves, to make my face sting. Making the streets run as rivers and and soaking through clothing too thin to withstand. Umbrellas turned inside out pulling their owners behind them in the streets.

We walk, hurrying so as not to freeze and laughing at the absurdity of the sidewalks - the rain choosing its own path.

The warm cafe with yellow lights and friendly staff. Umbrellas dripping, by the door that is constantly being opened and allowed to close on it's own - an unwelcome glimpse of nature every few minutes. I order an eggplant, spinach, goat cheese sandwich and fresh mint tea. The waiter catches my eye as we leave.

A new friend. A German woman. Shared smiles. More çay.

My skylight drips into a tin tray. The rain has blown the tarps that protect my room from the flooding sky. A bowl of satsumas and pears sit welcomingly on the shelf below the drips.

This is winter in Istanbul my friends. The place I currently call my home. The place of contrasts and endless surprises.

...Konya.

2011-12-20T05:25:00.000-08:00

Two weeks without a post. Yikes!

I recently returned to Istanbul after a few days in Konya. I was there for Seb-i Arus, the celebration of the death of Rumi. The experience was wonderful, but for now I am going to share with you one of the pictures I took.

...brain overload.

2011-12-07T08:11:00.001-08:00

I started my Turkish course yesterday. I already have over 100 new vocabulary words to memorize and a slew of grammer rules. My class is nine people, all from different countries; Croatia, Palestine, America (me), Japan, Syria, Germany (x2), Belgium, and England. I feel like my vocabulary is smaller than some of the people in the class, but I'm able comunicate outside of the classroom - with terrible grammar I'm sure. My teacher is a large, middle aged Turkish man named Mehmet who speaks with a booming voice. When someone pronounces a word or vowel wrong (which happens all the time) he just says it louder until they get it. At first I thought he was kind of harsh and unforgiving, but I'm realizing he has a good sense of humor.

The next month is going to be filled to the brim with learning. Three hours a day, five days a week. A full Turkish course book completed. I have my work cut out for me - and I'm so excited!

In the last week (before my course started) I started speaking in full sentences. I learned the future tense and I'm piecing together the things I know. Maybe my sentences are choppy and childlike, but they're sentences nonetheless.

~~~~~~~~~~

The first week of December is behind us and I keep thinking it's September. The days have been sunny, the weather pleasant. Yesterday night I was walking at 9 pm with a tanktop on. The benefit to Istanbul is you get really warm, really fast from climbing so many steep hills. This is also the downfall because in winter you put really warm clothing on and then get way too hot. I'm noticing this for myself; I usually always break a sweat when I walk somewhere. (Hopefully it's due to my overdressing, not my cardiovascular fitness level.)

Today finally, the rain came. Tomorrow we will once again be able to see the city, the blanket of smog washed down onto the city streets.

...a special post.

2011-11-29T10:27:00.001-08:00

I have exciting news!

The first guest post I've ever written is up. Check it out on the blog Skipping School by Kate Fridkis, my friend and fellow grown unschooler. And leave a comment if you feel inclined.

I'm not going to write a longer post at the moment, because I'm sitting in my living room listening to six people blabber away in Turkish. It's lovely.

Until next time!

...stairs with a view.

2011-11-28T08:05:00.001-08:00

Really the camera does not do ANYTHING for this scene.

I leave the apartment in the afternoon. There is a little store right across the street from the front door. I greet the man behind the counter, who I don't converse with but I'm accustomed to seeing every day; Merhaba, bir tane nar suyu istiyorum. He puts on plastic gloves and chops a bursting pomegranate into four pieces - each piece goes individually into the hand press, crushing the juicy seeds, cascading crimson juice into the waiting cup. It only takes one large nar to fill a 14oz cup. I pay him the equivalent of $1.34 and walk, sipping my juice, along the crooked cobblestone roads. The sun shines rather brightly and the breeze playes with my ponytail. It could be spring weather, except for the sparse blanket of decaying orange leaves and the half naked trees.

When I arrive at the top of the stairs leading down to Cihangir Park I look out at the intersection of the Golden Horn and Bosphorous rivers. The stairs are a good place to sit and contemplate, the layer of broken glass adding extra interest to the desolate hillside scene. A stray dog creeps down the stairs and under the railing to explore the patchwork of grass and garbage alongside the stairs. Across the bodies of water the surrounding land almost disappears into the sun and smog blanketing the city. I stand, halfway down watching the world go by, and watching the old man standing one landing below me. Minarets, like thorns across the landscape start their wailing call to prayer; the echo of each one following the first is soothing and haunting at the same time. The boats crisscrossing the waterways attract flocks of birds, hoping for something I'm sure.

I continue walking down the hill toward the water. I can no longer see the beautiful scenery, just new(ish) apartment complexes and banks lining the busy road. But I know that the water, the minarets, the sun and the birds are all there from the right vantage point.

I am happy to be here.

...all or nothing.

2011-11-22T09:37:00.001-08:00

Every once in a while I do this silly thing where I stop exercising. I stop completely. I get pretty unmotivated and I sit around a lot. Just the thought of going for a short run makes me winded and five pushups seem like a lot. I become unmotivated in other aspects of my life and my body doesn't feel as good.

The last few weeks in Turkey consisted of a lot of sitting around. The only movement I gave my body was walking from one place to another and dancing one or two nights a week. Close to nothing, considering my usual activity level. I stopped leaving the house as much, I spent a lot of time reading (not a bad thing, but I'm in Istanbul!) and usually woke up at lunchtime.

My friend pointed out she thinks I had a few weeks of culture shock, which could well be true. I don't know.

So, today I joined a gym around the corner from my house. It's a very nice facility, has one staff member that speaks English and offeres classes. Today I did cardio and weight lifting for and hour followed by an hour of yoga. Then a few hours later I had a two-hour private Turkish gypsy dance lesson; talk about a lot of sweat. Tonight I'm going dancing with friends to a live Turkish gypsy band.

Four hours already today and I'm laying in bed as I write, resting up for the next three or more hours of dancing. My stomach hurts a little, but I don't blame it. Going from no exercise whatsoever to a full day is a little crazy, if you ask me.

Where is my sense of moderation?

I have no idea, but I'm glad to be back in my skin and full of energy!

...the joys of a shared apartment.

2011-11-18T23:14:00.001-08:00

I awoke this morning at precisely 7 am to the sound of laughter and singing coming from the living room. After going to bed at 3 am this was not the best surprise. I closed my eyes tight and contemplated finding my ear plugs. But, the happy Turkish chatter persisted and finally I was lured from my room, sleepy eyed, feet dragging.

My room mate introduced my to his seven friends, who's names only lingered in my memory the second after they were uttered. They sat me down, excusing my disheveled hair and offering me a beer. A beer first thing in the morning? I accepted the beer; why not, I'll only live once. It wasn't the morning for them, of course, their reveling carried over from the concert during the night.

I was at the concert too, my favorite performer a band called Bandista; a kind of rock, Black Sea Turkish music fusion. The overcrowded venue pulsing with the strobe lights and singing at the top of their lungs. There's something magical about being in the center of a crowd, all singing in Turkish.

Back in the living room of my apartment, I sat around the table with my new friends, listening to them sing. Traditional Turkish songs - lilting voices - I want to sing like that. My house mate knows that I can sing one Turkish song, Beni Beni, and tried to get me to sing. It was a struggle trying to tell them I didn't have a voice, I had just woken up; and it's much harder to sing when put on the spot in a group of Turkish people I don't know.

Eventually we put on music and got up to dance. They taught me some form of Turkish line dance, holding pinkies, going around in a circle, I forget the name. They were impressed with how fast I caught on.

We danced, sang and talked (with a limited amount of English) until 9 am when the sleep coma started to set in. As the day started in the world outside the friends went home, finally ending the night.

It is now 10 am. My house mate is asleep in the living room, hunched in a wooden folding chair. I didn't want to spend my Saturday sleeping, but my eyes are already starting to drift close. The promise of a Cihangir breakfast (at about 4:15 pm) awaits when I awake.

...maybe I'm crazy?

2011-11-14T11:24:00.001-08:00

This is how I feel right now. (Although not a bad feeling,

it is relatively new to me.)

I am renting a room for the next two months. Tonight is my first night.

Half of the 'living room' art studio.

As I write I sit in the 'living room' that is officially the art studio of the woman who owns the flat. The white, slightly warped walls are hung haphazardly with paintings in many stages of completion. The floors are splattered with paint and the table in the middle of the room is home to a well used paint palette and a vase of paint brushes. My landlady, her husband and my two housemates sit around this cluttered table, conversation flowing in Turkish; this guttural, unique language. In the background Turkish music comes from the speakers attached to the ancient computer in the corner. The smell of cigarette smoke lingers in the air.

My rickety bunk bed and green wall.

The other half of my little room.

My room has a rickety bunk bed (missing its top bunk) set against a bright green wall. The two small tables and the dresser are paint splattered and in dire need of a cleaning. Luckily the house cleaner is scheduled to arrive tomorrow at 10am.

The kitchen is a little room, with a little fridge and a joke of a stove; one of those plug in hot plates. The cupboards contain a random assortment of dishes and çay (tea, pronounced 'chai').

It seems I have found a real cultural immersion in the middle of the
city. My house mates don't speak English. Luckily my landlady and
her husband speak at least some.

We all went to dinner tonight to a restaurant that doesn't have a
waiter - we write down what we want on a piece of paper and send it
down a floor on an ancient dumbwaiter. The food is fantastic. I started
with mercimek çorbası ('lentil soup') traditionally topped with lemon
juice. Extremely satisfying. I would love to learn to make this.

After I had a mixed plate of dolma (literally translating to 'stuffed')
made with grape leaves, cabbage
leaves and red peppers.

~~~~~~~~~~

I e-mailed the Turkish teacher I'm in correspondance with about
starting private lessons in the next few days. I don't feel good about
waiting until December 5th for the course to start.

At least I'm living in a house where I can't speak English.
Faster learning.

Oneof my housemates is an actor, the other is a journalist; my landlady isan artist. Their friends are liberal, artsy, open minded people.

Ithink I'm going to have a good time. I might even take up doing artagain.

...a little more clarification.

2011-11-10T12:52:00.000-08:00

Since I have arrived inTurkey I haven't really known what I'm doing or what I want to do. Iknow I would love to learn Turkish, but one month is not long enoughto get much under my belt, and courses exceed my travel budget.

I had this image oftraveling being sugar coated and fun. Even expecting to encounterhard experiences I didn't expect to feel empty and lost.

Today I had a lot ofquestions and no answers. Why do I feel so disconnected? What is thepurpose of all this? What do I want to do here? What do I want to doin the future? Why can't I figure this out?

I am tired of sitting aroundwithout a goal in mind. And I am learning that I prefer stayinglonger in each place I travel, getting to know the area, the people,the language. Instead of racing from place to place, barely making itto the tourist sights and never getting a real, long, satisfyingdrink. To travel and stay longer in each place, I need to have somesort of plan; being spontaneous is lovely, but I need something tofocus on while I am living.

I made the first step towarda plan this afternoon. I bought tickets from Izmir, Turkey to Beirut,Lebanon for January 26th. I will take six weeks of intensive Arabicclasses starting February 20th. The school I found has many goodreviews and is in downtown Beirut. I will probably spend three monthstotal in Lebanon.

This evening over sahlep (aTurkish drink made from powdered iris root) I discussed with Dianewhat I wanted to do in the next month. And I decided I do want totake a Turkish course, even if it's only a month and I will beswitching to Arabic shortly. I also decided to see what I can doabout some traditional Turkish gypsy dance classes. Diane knows agypsy woman who teaches; she doesn't speak English, but I can learnby watching. The last thing I would like to do is take some cookingclasses. I would especially love to learn how to make the traditionalflatbreads. I see women in restaurant windows straddling round worktables, low to the floor and caressing dough into thin, round ekmek.

Having these ideas is good,but money is also an issue. Courses and classes are expensive and Ididn't budget enough money to be very free in my spending. Also, if Iwant to focus on studying it is relatively difficult to be travelingfrom couch to couch staying with hosts. I would like to rent a roomfor the next month.

I called my mom and my dadthis evening to try and figure out what I could do. They started aneducation account for me when I was born; but I didn't reallyconsider it as one of my options. I thought since I don't need itnow, I'll just save it for down the road. But why not use it now -this is as good a time as ever. And I am very lucky to have thissupport so I don't have to work right away.

Tomorrow I will go to thelanguage school to talk with the teachers; the intensive coursestarted last week, so I will have to take private lessons. I willtalk to people I know about finding a place to live. And I will seekout dance and cooking lessons.

I don't know if these thingswill be what I am ultimately searching for, but they are a step inthe right direction. And tonight as I write I'm feeling a little lessoverwhelmed.

...lost beauty.

2011-11-09T15:54:00.000-08:00

The Süleymaniye Mosque.

I went to the Süleymaniye Mosque with Diane the other day. And I started thinking about beauty in the physical world.

Nature continues to show us beauty, but man made structures are rarely built with beauty in mind these days. Or else the definition of beauty has been greatly altered. Where is the artists touch?

'Modern' buildings consist of stark lines, simple colors and boring designs.

We are living in a world where instant gratification takes precedence and the idea of working on any structure for more than two years is a luxury. Where it's more important to get-it-done so as to not lose any money.

Old mosques and churches are a window back into the world when everyday objects were beautiful.

...life as a Western woman.

2011-11-07T01:28:00.000-08:00

Turkey is giving me twists and turns.

It started with CouchSurfing, an organization meant for travelers and by some people, misused. (I have only been a member of CouchSurfing for a short while and I have had a good experience. It just depends on the person.)

When I log onto the CouchSurfing website it automatically updates my location. And two days after I arrived in Istanbul I had two e-mails from Turkish guys, inviting me to coffee. I replied to them because it was nice someone was interested in meeting me. But a few hours later I had another ten e-mails from Turkish guys wanting to meet me for coffee or offer me a couch to stay on.

The actual messages they sent were not the most welcoming either: I saw your picture... or, I want to couch you...

There were a few that mentioned wanting to practice English, or just talk. And one even said upfront that he knows a lot of guys in Turkey use CouchSurfing as a dating service, and that's not what he had in mind. But with the few uncomfortable messages in the mix I was not able to take any of them seriously.

If I had initiated the connections it would be welcoming to get that many responses. But they had e-mailed me, not knowing my plans for Istanbul, offering to show me around or provide a place to stay. It was more than a little perturbing.

So I talked to my friend Diane, who I am staying with. She told me CouchSurfing is often used as a dating service in Turkey and the Middle East by men. Because of media the main idea about a Western woman is that she is free with her body and will have sex with anyone. Putting the Western women who are not like that in potentially sticky situations.

I sent e-mails to all the guys thanking them for the invitations but telling them I wasn't interested. And I changed my picture from me sitting on the beach to me blacksmithing. Like I guessed, I haven't had an e-mail since.

So my first impression of Turkish guys (even though I have been here before and met Turkish guys before) was not so good. And I was pretty down about it. Do I really want to go to the Middle East if I I feel so frustrated with just e-mails in the most Western of Middle Eastern countries?

And I still don't know what I want to do.

Along the same line, I met a guy (a friend of a friend) the other day for a drink. He is 25 and a nice guy. We talked for hours, went for dinner, went for drinks, he showed me his store and he came dancing with my friend and I that night. I think we spent ten hours together that day.

The conversation didn't really flow between us, but he was a nice guy and I wanted to give him a chance as a friend.

At the end of the first night I got the sense he liked me more than a friend. And my guard was up for two reasons; 1) The CouchSurfing e-mails I had received from other Turkish guys, and 2) In our e-mail correspondance before we met he had said, I'll see you tomorrow for our date. I had to correct him that this was NOT a date, just meeting a friend of a friend.

During our first meeting he had offered to have me along on a trip to the countryside, show me the city and have me visit him at his store every day. Okay, too much interest.

I didn't see him for a few days and then yesterday I went to a reggae club with my friend Diane. This particular dance club had been in our conversation when we first met and he had expressed wanting to take me. I told him I already had plans to go and somehow he was invited along. I was not too keen on having him there, but he was just a friend, so what could the harm be?

It was fun at the club for quite a while. I danced. Diane danced. And Diane's friend from Sudan danced. My friend sat on the sidelines and had drink after drink. First warning sign.

After about two hours he got up and danced and was having a good time. He's playful when he dances.

But, his playfulness changed when I started dancing with a guy at the club. His face turned to stone. I could see he was livid even though I was halfway across a crowded and dimly lit dance floor.

All of a sudden the power went out (that's what happens in Turkey; all the time) and he was by my side in the blink of an eye. He didn't say anything, just stood there and glared.

The guy I was dancing with looked a little confused. I walked away from them both.

When the power came back on he grabbed me and started dancing close. After one song Diane started to put her jacket on and I followed suit thankful for the exit.

We said goodnight in the street outside the club. The guy said he would walk me home. Diane replied, no you won't. He didn't get it and said again that he would walk me home. Keep in mind, I'm headed to Diane's house. Diane said it again with a little more force. Still, he said he would walk me home. Diane's face turned hard and her voice turned cold and he listened that time. I don't think he's ever been talked to like that by a woman.

We have had e-mail correspondance since. Me telling him this relationship won't work. Him apologizing and saying he was only kidding.

I really love and value the person who gave me this guys contact information. And I know she is very close with him. But I am learning as I travel that every connection in life is a personal connection. And we all see a slightly different projection of the people we meet.

~~~~~~~~~~

This is just a story. A learning experience.

I have met some lovely Turkish guys. And no matter how positive a person I am negative experiences tend to stand out more than positive. My guard is raised a little more than it has been in the past.

Now I know that for most Turkish guys the most attractive women are Russian. Blond hair, blue eyes and curves. I kind of fit the bill.

Sometimes turning mens heads is satisfying. And other times it feels like being put in a cage.

...my day.

2011-11-02T18:10:00.000-07:00

1. Got my cell phone unlocked so I have a Turkish phone.
2. Went fruit and veggie shopping at a little local store.
3. Met Kaan, a friend of Mira's (my friend from Whidbey Island) for beer at a cafe/bar and talked for four hours.
4. Went with Kaan to eat Kokoreç (a lamb intestine sandwich, Traditional Turkish) which was delicious.
5. Went with Kaan to try hazelnut vodka, which was delicious.
6. Met Diane and the three of us continued on to Araf (a bar/club) to dance to a live Balkan band until 2am.
AMAZING!!!

P.S. I would love to write a more detailed story, but it's 3am and my bed is calling.

...song in the streets.

2011-10-30T14:08:00.000-07:00

After getting my visa and going through passport check I walked out of the Sabiha Gökçen Airport in Istanbul to be greeted by Ahmet, a friend of a friend of a friend. First thing when we got to his car he realized his tire was flat, and had to spend some time fixing it. Luckily he had a spare.

The drive into the city was fun. I read all the Turkish signs. Time to get my language skills working.

Because my friend (who I will be staying with for some of the next month) wasn't going to be home from work until 4pm, Ahmet took me to get some food. It was really very nice of him. And we had good Turkish food. But he only had soup so he finished before me; and because our language knowledge limited us from talking much, he sat and watched me eat without talking. Pretty uncomfortable feeling.

At four he drove me toward Tepebaşı, the area where my friend lives. When we got close he made a turn in the wrong direction and I ended up telling him how to get to her house. I remembered from two years ago!!

It is wonderful to be here again. To be staying with a good friend. And as we sat an talked at the kitchen table the call to prayer echoed through the streets. Though I am not religious I think the call to prayer is beautiful and gives a chance to breath in such a busy city.

We went out to walk around this evening. From my friends house it is just a few blocks to Istiklal, the walking street that a million people pass through in a day. It was packed on a freezing (not literally, but pretty darn cold) Sunday evening. We walked to Taksim square and then made our way through the back streets to a little restaurant where we had dinner.

I love it here.

...at the airport.

2011-10-29T19:35:00.000-07:00

(No picture today. I'm on an airport computer.)

It's 3am and I'm at the London Luton airport paying 1pound/10minutes for Internet. But I wanted to make a quick update on my travels.

I spent a total of two weeks in London. I stayed with three CouchSurfing hosts. I went dancing quite a few times and I stayed up 'till all hours of the morning. It was fun, but unfulfilling.

My wish for the remainder of my travels, however long they play out to be, is for lots of new experiences, laughs and dances. And to be immersed in culture.

There you have it. A quick update.

P.S. I think my writing will start flowing with help of Turkish culture.

...I haven't found it yet.

2011-10-25T04:36:00.000-07:00

Hyde Park... I think...

I don't know what I'm looking for, butI haven't found it yet.

And I just realized I've been in London for over a week and haven't posted. Sorry readers!

I have been in London for over a weeknow. Five days to go. And I like it. But I don't love it. There arelittle parts that catch my eye; the old buildings, the little hole inthe wall stores, the places to go dancing, and the people I've met.But overall it's just another large, populated, Western city. Ofcourse there's nothing wrong with these cities. The thing is, as atraveler, my longing is to experience cultures that challenge me,that introduce me to new ways of thinking, being, eating, anddancing.

In London I am am surrounded by othercultures, but I'm not immersed in culture. There are littlesub-cultures all over. Arabic and Turkish being the most prominent thatI have encountered. Which is good. But it's hard to immerse in asub-culture.

The feeling I get here is of spinning my wheels but not going anywhere. Which is a necessary feeling sometimes. However, it's not a feeling I like very much.

So there you go ladies and gentlemen. I write as I sit in a cafe listening to three little kids run around screaming, my favorite Balkan music playing in my ears. (Listen to the second playlist.)

~~~~~~~~~~

Outside the Camden Lock Markets.

I spent the day yesterday in Camden exploring the markets which was really lovely. And I'm headed to Hampstead today to see what I can find.

Blessings,

Twyla

P.S. My dad keeps telling me that people read my blog. But I would love to get comments as well. Being able to 'see' my readers is sure a motivation to write more!

...another big city.

2011-10-19T10:12:00.000-07:00

I'll start with the last few days in New York City.

My other cousin (technically second cousin, I think) flew out to visit last Wednesday. Just like Garrett, I haven't spent much time getting to know Cooper. And while Garrett was at work, which is just about all the time, Cooper and I went out and explored. We walked around a lot. And ate really really expensive pizza that was delicious, but I hope I don't ever spend that much on pizza again.

Cooper on Roosevelt Island.

And the next day Cooper went out to explore and I stayed at home. All day. I didn't leave the house until 10pm when we went out to go to a game bar. And never go there because we ran into the Wall Street protesters at Washington Square Park. And decided to stay. We marched with them until 1am and then decided to go home when a few people started to get rowdy and the police got ready to make arrests.
It was extremely fun. And I will admit, I don't know much about the protesting. I agree with the general idea. But I'm not into politics and therefore I haven't kept up. But, for whatever it's worth, we added another four numbers to the crowd.

Marching.

On Sunday Garrett didn't have work and the three of us went to lunch at McGee's Pub which is the pub where the How I Met Your Mother TV show is based. Of course, that doesn't mean anything to me, I don't watch TV very often.
I had the McGee's burger which I regretted afterward because I don't do well eating that much meat. And burgers and fries are not my favorite choice of food. But we had a good time nonetheless.
After lunch we went to the Hotel Pennsylvania. Which might or might not be a famous hotel. We took the elevator to the 18th floor and stealthily went into a utility room where stairs led up another few floors to the door on the roof. It was beautiful, with a view of the buildings around us. And slightly nerve inducing since we weren't supposed to be up there.

The three cousins on the roof of the Hotel Pennsylvania.

~~~~~~~~~~

Monday was my big day of traveling. Leaving the US for the next part of my life. And my stomach had a few flutters in the morning as I got my things together. And then I went to the subway with my huge backpack. Then transfered to the Airtrain to JFK. And then I wasn't nervous any longer. And I wasn't particularly excited either. I was just going through motions. Check in for flight. Go through customs. Wait a few hours (I got to the airport earlier than planned and my flight was delayed over an hour). Load the plane. And just like that I left the US for the next year; or however long it turns into.

Waiting for my flight at JFK.

And when I was standing in front of my seat as the plane loaded a man walked by and spoke to me in German. (I was on a plane to Dusseldorf.) I told him I don't speak German and he switched to English. He said he was sitting a few rows behind me and we are next door neighbors. An interesting exchange, not the usual comment of a passerby. Then a few minutes later, before the plane left he walked back to my seat and invited me to sit with him. And I accepted; the seat next to me was empty and he was pretty cute.
And we talked. The whole ride. All seven hours, or however long it was. There's something freeing about talking to someone you know you will never see again. And when we got off the plane he went to his connecting flight and I was exhausted and went to sleep for a few hours. On my stomach. On a bench. My layover was about nine hours. So I rotated between sleeping, eating, and walking around like a zombie. Listening to German chatter and watching people come and go.

Zombie Twyla in the airport

in Dusseldorf.

Then it was time for my next flight. Just an hour long and we were landing in London. I got through customs (the woman asked me a lot of questions and wasn't happy that I said I would be going to Jordan but didn't have a visa) and picked up my backpack from checked luggage.

Landing in London.

Made it to the bus and slept until we arrived in Stratford. In Stratford I walked around confused for a while, looking like a tourist (something I don't particularly like) and then figured out how to buy a bus ticket and caught a bus to Leyton where my host lived. I called him from a phone at a Casino and he came to meet me.

And all this time I haven't been overly excited. Yes, it's beautiful. And everyone has a cool accent. I'm starting to wonder if it's just because I've traveled in this area of the world before. Or was I tired. Or if I'm already back into my travel mode. Wherever I go, people are just living their lives. I am living my life.

We made dinner, my host and I, and went to a CouchSurfing get together in the center of the city.

On the bus to the CouchSurfing

meeting with Resit, my host.

At the gathering I met people to host me for the rest of my time in London. And someone to stay with in the South Eastern part of Turkey where the Kurds live. It's funny how everyone in the US I talked to about going to the Eastern part of Turkey said don't go, it's not safe. And now I have met two people who live there (my host is Kurdish as well) and say it is completely safe. I am very glad to hear that. Looks like I'm going to be in the Eastern part of Turkey in a few months!

~~~~~~~~~~

Today I woke up and looked at my computer for the time. Then asked the guys remodeling the bathroom what time it was because I didn't trust the time on my computer. Three in the afternoon! What do you mean three in the afternoon!! I guess I have more jet lag than I thought.
And I have spent the last two hours checking e-mail and writing this blog.
My host arrived home from work a few minutes ago and he is taking a nap. We are headed to a Brazilian club tonight.

I am in London. Living life. As the sun sets outside the window.

...I like this city.

2011-10-11T18:40:00.001-07:00

At the beginning of last week I spent a good amount of time on my computer in the house. My motivation to go out and 'do' things was lacking. And I found lots of recipes I want to try.

I even found a few recipes I did try.

Whole Wheat bread with whey and molasses.

And then I got tired of sitting inside. And the sun came out from hiding. That helped.

It was at least 85 degrees on Sunday. I took the metro to the tippy top of Manhattan with my cousin and his friend and the plan was to walk to the bottom. We went through a park, along a trail, on a railroad, on another trail and along some more roads. Unfortunately we didn't make it to Battery Park at the bottom; due to a late start and two slow walking guys (shhh, don't tell them). My cousin and I decided to head home about halfway down the Island, while our other friend continued on a little while longer.

Looking at New Jersey on the West side of Manhattan.

Looking South.

Once at home I baked a quiche in preparation for the evenings picnic at the park.

Quiche.

And we spent the whole evening enjoying food, good company and a multitude of mosquitoes. From which I have at least 35 itchy souvenirs. I counted.

Picnicking.

~~~~~~~~~~

Monday rolled around and I spent another sunny day walking around the perimeter of Central Park. Everyone seemed to be out: running, biking, walking, roller blading, skate boarding, boating, sun bathing and picnicking.

The reservoir in Central Park.

I love the little patches (or in the parks case, very large patches) of nature in amongst the bustle of the city. It makes for a nice contrast and a necessary escape.

In the evening I headed to Coney Island with my cousins roommate (I think I could even call him my roommate... I've been living here for over two weeks now.) and his friend. Where we met two other friends. And went swimming and sat on the beach as the sun went down.

My cousin arrived later and we all went on Deno's wheel, like a ferris wheel, but with carts that rested on rollers. A slightly scary addition to the otherwise un-scary ride. The view of lights was lovely.

And then dinner of deep fried frog legs and lemonade. Pretty classy if I do say so myself. They taste like a cross between fish and chicken.

And to end the night, another swim in the ocean.

On the ride.

Again.

Some of the view.

~~~~~~~~~~

Today I had lunch with Kate of Eat the Damn Cake and Skipping School which was inspiring and super fun. It is refreshing to meet people I can talk with about anything at all. And go thrift store shopping with!

And I feel like I 'should' write more about life. And travel. And my feelings. But I'm not going to. My written words don't seem to be flowing today.

Until the next time!

...a hike in New York.

2011-10-03T17:44:00.000-07:00

We took a train an hour upstate and entered a whole other world. The city noise faded away and the silence of the forest enveloped us. We hiked up to the top of the mountain (small though it was) in the fog and cool air. No view of the surrounding valleys, just trees in their quite existence.

From left: Pete, Garrett, Me, Wilson, Dan and Courtney.

It's funny to think we have never really spent time

together until now.

Serenity.

Trying to climb the wall, but realizing my arms don't quite

reach far enough to go the rest of the way.

Hanging out in the old abandoned

house in the middle of the woods.

And that, my friends, was a splendid day.

...my new friend Timothy.

2011-09-28T15:56:00.000-07:00

[My blog hasn't let me log in for thepast week. So here is my post that I wasn't able to get out earlier.]

Timothy on my nose. (Please excuse the

grape skin in my teeth.)

I was sitting outside today, washing myfeet under the hose when a bright green cricket hopped onto my foot.He was so cute and I started talking to him. He walked around fromfoot to foot and I put my hand down, to see if he would climb on. Hecrawled around for 45 minutes at least before I had to put him in thegarden and move onto other things. His name is Timothy.

[Note: I'm actually in NYC with my cousin Garrett at the moment. I have been here four days now and it's been a blast. A post to come soon.]

Twyla

...a lot of water.

2011-09-10T16:39:00.000-07:00

The last week or so has beenrain, rain, rain. Torrential rain. A few thunder and lightning stormsto accompany the rain. All thanks to tropical storm Lee.

The streets ran with water.The corn fields started to lean. And the Susquahanna river gotfuller, and fuller; stopping finally, yesterday evening at animpressive 59 ½ feet above the usual level.

All but one of the bridgesover the river in the York/New Salem/Spring Grove area are completelysubmerged. Willa (my aunt) and I were driving into York on Thursdayand tried to cross a bridge that had been clear the previous evening.Now, not so much. The water was touching the wires on thetelephone poles! That's a good 25+ feet above the bridge! I havenever seen anything like it!

Houses all along theSusquahanna were being evacuated. This area hasn't had so much rainsince Agnes in '72. In fact, so far the river is only 5 feet lowerthan when Agnes passed through. Looks like Lee's going to have to trya little harder if he wants to beat her.

Today the sun took his turn.It was in the 80's. Absolutely beautiful. And only the slightest bithumid. Although, I looked out the window fifteen minutes ago and therain made a drizzled appearance and then disappeared...

...goals.

2011-09-05T15:04:00.000-07:00

I just read a blog post titled, The Best Goal is No Goal that I happened to find on Daily Good: News that Inspires and it got me thinking... What is all the hype about setting goals?

First, let me tell you, I'm not a goal-oriented person. I don't feel that I achieve more or am more productive when I have a goal. In fact, when I make a rigid goal it usually doesn't happen. (Which is a whole other topic about my aversion to conformity, authority, rules, and the like.)

Why is it that we (as human beings) need to structure and control and shape our futures to the extent that there is no room for spontaneity. Don't get me wrong, I think having dreams and ideas and striving for what you want is essential. But, being driven to a set goal can become a race; if there's always a finish line, we tend to miss the scenery. Living in such a goal-oriented country makes it hard to slow down. Hard to just be in the present moment.

I went running a few days ago and felt quite terrible during the run. Of course, I felt wonderful afterward, but I am not in the same athletic shape as I used to be. The next day I ran again with the same results, during and after. Having two consecutive days of running I told myself that I had 'started running again'. On my runs I have to concentrate on the ground in front of me because it seems to be the best way to continue running. The view of the sidewalk/grass tends to get a little old.
On the third day I went outside and didn't feel like running. So I went on a walk. A long walk on some back country roads near the farm. I was able to drink in my surroundings. It was stunning. I was relaxed. And I felt equally as good afterward as I had from running, albeit not as sweaty.
It seems that my goal of being a runner (even if that goal only lasted for two days) didn't work out. And I realize no one is perfect; if I run one day and then don't run again for a month, or six months, that's okay. I'm not a lazy person because of it. There are plenty of activities in the world that I love. I don't need to make running one of them.

I don't need to try and be a certain person. I am Twyla.

...food and other preoccupations.

2011-08-29T16:39:00.000-07:00

The yard right outside Grandma's kitchen window.

I am in heaven. Or I would be in heaven if I believed in that.

If you didn't know already I'm a slight foodie; a health foodie mind you. So an organic farm with an organic health food store on the property is just about as good as it gets.

On top of that, the there are ripe apples, pears, grapes, and many kinds of edible weeds. Soon there will also be ripe persimmons, kiwi berries and hopefully black walnuts. Can I ask for more?

~~~~~~~~~~

Grandma chopping apples.

A lot of the apples fall off the trees and are half eaten or slightly pock-marked by bugs. Not bad, just slightly less appetizing to eat whole. The easiest solution was apple sauce.

The end result.

A little cinnamon on top. I'll say it myself. Yummy!

~~~~~~~~~~

After the winds from the hurricane passed through on Saturday night I had a lot of fallen fruits to pick up. Mostly pears...

Branch of the pear tree.

...some apples from this tree...

Grandma likes to sit on the swinging bench to relax.

...and luckily no persimmons from this tree; they're still unripe.

Looking up the persimmon tree.

~~~~~~~~~~

In addition to all this bounty my Grandma is one of the most knowledgable people I know in the field of organic and wild foods. Need I say it again?

~~~~~~~~~~

I'll leave you with this...

I found this fella' in the garden.

Seize the day,

Twyla

...my first time on Grandma's farm (and the culmination of a cross-country road trip.)

2011-08-26T14:25:00.000-07:00

Jay, Dean and Grandma eating lunch/dinner Grandma

made for us, right after we arrived.

I arrived at my Grandma's farm in Stoverstown, Pennsylvania this afternoon. A man named Bill walked out from the health food store (that my aunt owns) and introduced himself; I didn't realize at first that he is my uncle. Pretty funny realizing I'm related to someone I'm only just meeting.

The farm is set on 60 acres consisting of Grandma's house (the first solar house in Pennsylvania), Sonnewald health food store (which Grandma started in '55), three trailers where different people live, plus fruit/nut trees and vegetables and lots of open space. The land is beautiful.

I hope to learn as much as I can from Grandma while I am here.

Jay and Dean. My road trip buddies.

The road trip included mostly driving and eating. Plus a white-water rafting trip in Montana, a day with relatives (Jay's sister in law's family) and two major lighting/thunder storms. Of course there were also great conversations, laughs and smiles across the expansive United States.

I was nervous to go white-water rafting, seeing as I usually have a hard time with small boats. But, the river caught me off guard. I loved it. Plus our guide was extremely competent (and good looking) and happened to be from South Africa. Here I am, ready to head off to the Middle East and I want to go travel in Southern Africa. I suppose everything in due time.

After rafting we hopped in the car and drove nonstop (except for 45 minutes the following day, and potty breaks) for 29 hours arriving in Chardon, Ohio late Tuesday night.

Yesterday we did a lot of sitting, a little walking/running, and a fair amount of visiting. It was wonderful to meet my friends extended family. The air was humid toward the evening and as it got dark a storm rolled in. The lightning proceeded the thunder and rain by about four hours, so I fell asleep to silent flashes, like a natural strobe. At about 2am I woke to rain falling on my face (mind you I was inside and at least four feet from the nearest window) and the angry laughter of the sky. The rain fell harder and the driving wind whipped it sideways and directly into the house through the screen windows. I scrambled through the house to shut them as puddles were already forming beneath the windows. As the storm raged directly above us, the thunder rattled the house and I fell asleep an hour later to the incessant rain and receding flashes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I went on a walk this evening in the humid twilight. There happens to be a park across the street from the store. The bugs sang their ever-present song and I smiled to myself: I love sweating in warm night air.

I was planning to sleep in a tent I set up earlier but just a few minutes ago I heard the rain start again. And then saw those beautiful flashes. I guess I'll be sleeping inside for a few days. Waiting to see what course Irene (the hurricane) decides to take.

Sieze the day,

Twyla

...voyage.

2011-08-15T15:27:00.000-07:00

It is a funny time, the days before a huge shift. I feel like I am here physically, but my emotional self is already way ahead of me... ready for the adventure, the newness...

I had a farewell benefit dance last night. The crowd was smaller than I had hoped for, but it meant so much to me to have the support of the people I am close to in the dance community.
And, as a plus, I raised enough money to see me through at least two months of travel.

I feel as if everything around me is in an ever progressing state of closure; the farewell dance, saying goodbye to people, packing all of my belongings, etc. The funny thing is I still see people I've said bye to and have to say it again. As I start to feel closure in each area of my life on the Island I feel my compass turning outward and facing the direction of other lands.

I don't know what the next year(s) will bring. Whatever unfolds, I am ready. Ready to learn, to dance, to laugh, to fall, to connect, to get lost, to grow, to play, to cry and maybe to understand a little.

Bring it on,
Twyla

...life IS good.

2011-05-30T21:07:00.001-07:00

I just spent the weekend at an unschooling conference with some amazing friends.

Here's what I learned:

I love meeting new people. Even if it is exhausting and takes me out of my comfort zone.

Here's to doing what you love,
Twyla

P.S. Check out Amy Steinberg's song Yes. Love it.

...just do it.

2011-04-24T15:04:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning to find a wonderful realization tickling the edges of my consciousness.

It went something like this:

I am the shaper of my path. If I want to do something, I just have to go do it. There is nothing stoping me. Every decision I make can either bring me closer or farther away from my goals. It's as simple as: Just. Doing. It.

Of course sometimes it may seem a lot harder than that. The little voices inside me tell me I can't, or try to trick me. But the thing is, now that I realize I really can do anything, those little voices can't stop me.

The quality of my existence on this quite-often-crazy planet is up to me.

Just do it,
Twyla

...a poetry game with friends.

2011-04-05T14:47:00.000-07:00

At a friends house for dinner with my dad and sister we found ourself playing a poetry game. Here are the results:

If I were made of thorns my shoulder would not be your comfort
and I really, really like that idea
or perhaps it is the other way around.

What if we all did things exactly the same
and hair grew wings
but our voices were bird chirps
because the light in the center is brighter than ever before
until everything falls away.

What if you could bathe in the light
and the end and the beginning were no different
but thoughts flew like birds, from mind to clouds
because the wind blew the apples away
until the grass grows wings and I swim through the meadow.

What if life smelled of lemons
and we became a psychic
but my sweater has a loose thread and I fear for my sanity
because what is happiness anyway? ...you touch it for a moment...
until the light revealed the hidden truth.

What if the clouds became pink
and chili peppers bled from the stars
but on some days you may just want to roll over and stay in bed
because there was no way to tell the difference
until the houses bloom like mushrooms of the west.

What if the knombs were as juicy as grapes
and I don't know why that wouldn't be the most spectacular thing to happen
but it could not be figured out
because nothing was as warm as bath water
until we gave birth to Twyla.

An interesting collection if I do say so myself....

How to play: Each person take a piece of paper and write a sentence starting with 'What if...' then fold the top over so no one can read what you wrote. Then pass your paper to the person on your right. At the top of your new paper write a sentence starting with 'and..' before passing it to the person on your right, once again. Continue this way, writing a sentence, folding over and passing with the following sentence beginnings: but, because, and until.

Once you have sentences with all five beginnings, unfold the paper and see what you've got.

Blessings,
Twyla

...walking, walk, walked.

2011-02-22T16:12:00.000-08:00

walk (wôk), v.i. 1. to go or travel on foot at a moderate speed or pace; proceed by steps; move by advancing the feet alternately so that there is always one foot on the ground in bipedal locomotion and two or more feet on the ground in quadrupedal locomotion.

The sun started to peek from behind the clouds about an hour ago as I sat on my bed reading Jamie Olivers' The Naked Chef Takes Off. Time for a walk.

I glow when I go on walks; I smile, I notice the little things and I have space to think. I love walking just for the sake of it. Not hurrying, or power walking, or walking to reach a destination. Walking for the sake of walking. One foot in front of the other. I like to walk in the middle of the road. (Unless, of course, there are a large number of cars.) That way I can see everything equally on each side of the road, rather than the narrowness and confinement of sidewalks. They seem to say, 'this is where you're supposed to walk' and of course when I feel like I'm supposed to do something, I usually don't do it.

Today I walked down into a neighborhood across from where I am living. Cookie cutter houses lined the street with two large garbage cans each, a symbol of our so called 'wealth'. Shuttered windows rested above perfectly manicured lawns next to two car garages. But, despite the sameness of the neighborhood I took care to notice the little things....

...the pale pink buds starting to peek out from the trees.
...a little snow man stranded in a driveway, its snow friends all melted away.
...a smile exchanged with a passerby.
...the moss in the cracks of the pavement that pushes back despite everything working against it.
...the way the sun kissed my cheeks despite the cold air.

For me, walking brings out the beauty in everything.

Seize the day,
Twyla

...and sometimes life intervenes.

2011-02-16T20:51:00.000-08:00

Sometimes life jumps in to assist us when we least expect.

I have been spending too much on gas in the past months. Driving too much. Feeling a little bit guilty about it, but mostly being lazy and coming up with excuses not to ride my bike.

*life intervenes*

Today when I turned my car on to drive home from school I found that my transmission was stuck in reverse. (Stuck in the reverse position but not actually able to go in that direction...) I finally forced it into neutral so I could push my car backward in order to get it out of the parallel parking spot. Luckily it's just the reverse that gave out.

So it looks like my bike and the buses are going to (once again) become my good friends. This will be frustrating for a little while until I get back in tip-top riding shape. But I know I will be happy about it in the long run. (Or at least... I hope so.)

Life works in mysterious ways. I'm learning to tune in and pay attention to these things.

Seize the day,
Twyla

...all the time in the world.

2011-02-08T07:51:00.000-08:00

I find myself running from one activity to the next, never resting, always striving to 'do' something so I feel productive. Blacksmithing, learning Arabic, weightlifting, doing yoga, teaching dance, and socializing make up the bulk of the things I 'do' in a given week. With that schedule and the amount of driving time between all the activities, where is the time to relax, be still, and recuperate? I'll tell you this; it's not there.

Thinking about my crazy schedule makes me wonder, what's the rush? It comes down to accomplishment. For some reason, I've gotten it into my head that by the time I'm 20 I want to: run a successful business, speak 6 languages, be at the pique of my physical fitness, be a successful artist, make a lot of money and build a custom house. Somehow that doesn't sound very relaxing.

Kids grow up in an environment that pushes how much you can 'do' and doesn't stress how necessary it is to 'be'. How many times have you thought, I have to do something so I don't feel unproductive.
Welcome to my life. I constantly feel that if I'm not 'doing' I'm just wasting my time. And I get the feeling 99% of the rest of the world feels the same way.

Here's the thing; I have a whole life ahead of me and all the time in the world. It's not necessary to accomplish so much in such a short amount of time. I want to enjoy the little things, smell the roses, read a book.

With that, I give myself permission to stop trying to 'do' so much and just 'be' a little.

Seize the day,
Twyla

At the forge and anvil

2011-01-15T09:52:00.000-08:00

At the forge with Ryan Lovelace in the background.

At the anvil.

Being true to myself

2011-01-12T18:38:00.000-08:00

Song of the Open Road

by Walt Whitman
(1819-1892)

Afoot and light-hearted I take to the open road,

Healthy, free, the world before me,

The long brown path before me leading wherever I choose.

Henceforth I ask not good-fortune, I myself am good-fortune,

Henceforth I whimper no more, postpone no more, need nothing,

Done with indoor complaints, libraries, querulous criticisms,
Strong and content I travel the open road.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I was registering for Winter Quarter classes as Edmonds Community College I had a few different people telling my I should take Cultural Anthropology (including the teacher, who is my Arabic teacher). Going along with their suggestions, I registered for the class, even though it overlapped with my previous class. I talked with both of the instructors and figured it would be no problem.

I had a difficult time getting back into the 'school groove' this quarter, for a number of different reasons. Over the past week I found myself sitting through my Cultural Anthropology class with a constant argument in my head. Should I take the class.... should I drop the class.... and I came to the realization that if I wanted to spend more time doing art (the reason I didn't want to do multiple academic classes) then it was silly for me to be reading Anthropology textbooks and writing essays. It was, in fact, a class I wasn't planning to take.

I went to the student services today and dropped the class. I feel lighter. I was really worried that if I stuck it out (just because my friends wanted me to) I would be in a very stressful place of having to finish out the quarter in a class that didn't suit me.

I am learning more and more to trust my intuition, follow my heart and let my passion for life be my guide.

Carpe diem,

Twyla

Trusting.

2011-01-01T21:21:00.000-08:00

If we don't change the direction we are headed, we will end up where we are going. -Chinese Proverb

With the new year brings new challenges, new experiences and new ideals; as well as the shedding of things that no longer suite. Although, for me the new year is just another day in the grand scheme of things. Even with this way of looking at it, I feel some kind of a shift in my way of being. I know it isn't the fact that this is my first new year living on my own as an equal adult in this world. It's something on a different level; something I can't quite put my finger on. It feels good.

I am constantly experiencing events, meeting people and discovering new things that seem to be intertwined. And the more I pay attention to my inklings the more they manifest before my eyes. It is a wonderful, exciting place to be in. I feel like the star player of my life and yet I can step back and look with an outside perspective. Every day is so exciting and full of opportunity.

So happy new year, may 2011 be magical.

Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.

- Carl Bard

You must have been warned against letting the golden hours slip by. Yes, but some of them are golden only because we let them slip by. - James Matthew Barrie

A recipe for myself

2010-11-27T13:17:00.000-08:00

A Recipe for Myself

Written by: Me

Start with strength, finesse and artistry.

In a big bowl of vivaciousness combine half a pound curiosity and determination, plus two drops defiance; add in three pinches each of color, naughtiness, and exuberance: mix well.

In a bowl of equal magnitude pour liquid trust sprinkled with a pinch of bossiness.

While the two bowls marinate, blend together love, kindness and charm; add enough arrogance and jealousy to smooth out the texture of vast talent and carefree clumsiness. Into this mixture blend ten smiles and ten tears making sure to mix them seamlessly to overpower the confusion.

Once the first two bowls are thoroughly saturated, slowly combine them together to form a tough and juicy concoction. Pour the blended mixture overtop and let stand for eternity to form a coating of abundant silliness.

Remember to top the finished product with some attractive curves.

Enjoy your creation: Twyla Dill.

The first snow

2010-11-23T23:38:00.000-08:00

A clip from my journal last night:

I sat facing the fireplace reading my book while snow fell outside. Homemade apple sauce bubbled on the stove, its steam wafting cinnamon, nutmeg, vanilla, and orange zest throughout the house. Hot chocolate warmed my full belly after a dinner of pan seared, smoked paprika salmon, brown rice and steamed vegetables. Josh Groban sang in the background.
The smell of unrefined coconut oil and wood smoke linger on my skin as my eyes drift closed.

The early snowfall and my house-sitting job on Whidbey Island have been a wonderful release from the routine business of life. I have spent my time blacksmithing, cooking, listening to music, drinking tea, reading by the fire and neglecting most everything school-related. (I did watch a TV series on advertising to teenagers for my Small Business class which was quite interesting.)
The snow seems to take away my sense of time and urgency and allows me to just be. It is a wonderful feeling.
As much as I love school: it's environment and my classes; I look forward to the end of the quarter and my month of unplanned days and time for doing everything I love.

فرح السلام والمحبة,
Twyla

Tri-National US Servas Convention

2010-10-03T21:33:00.000-07:00

Where to start.

The past weekend I spent a great deal of time meeting new people and sharing stories at the Tri-National US Servas Convention. (US, Canada and Mexico) I was a speaker for two of the day workshops as part of a Youth Panel and also assisted in teaching an evening dance workshop with my dad and sister.

I want you to know about Servas; an international peace organization started in the 40's as a way to promote peace and encourage travel around the world. Traveling doesn't have to be out of reach and only for the 'well off' folks. Travel is accessible to everyone in every walk of life and Servas is the ultimate way to connect and share with people around the world.
I also wish to introduce you to Rita Golden Gelman, author of Tales of a Female Nomad and Female Nomad and Friends among an assortment of children's books. She is a phenomenal woman and is working on a project called Let's Get Global; a program to encourage travel in between high school and college (any any other time as well) for all Americans. I want to help her in this mission.

A note on my change of plans. I decided yesterday, after a few travel-oriented workshops and a handful of inspiring conversations that I am going to finish this year of school (focusing on my Arabic) and take off for some time abroad. I don't know my destination, but the Middle East is calling my name.

Masalam,
Twyla

Loving school (New vegetable: Taro root)

2010-09-26T10:45:00.001-07:00

I have been riding my bike to and from school every day, which has been working out so far. The weather has been nice to me and I don't have to worry about doing other cardio after my daily ten miles on the bike.

My classes on Monday-Thursday are at the beginning and end of my school day, so I have Business first thing in the morning, then I have time to do some studying for that class directly afterward. I am able to use the gym facilities so I get my daily weight lifting in right before lunch and then I eat lunch and have another hour to study for Arabic before my class.
When I get home I study until I go to bed.
And then I do it again the next day.

On Fridays I have Horticulture, which I can't say too much about so far; I have only had one class. We are learning to categorize plants. I am the youngest person in the class.

I only have about two hours of class time each day, but that means I have to spend the vast majority of my free time doing school work. Luckily I chose classes that I actually want to take, so spending my time designing a business plan and learning Arabic is fun.

Small Business Management is taught by a guy who has his own successful business, so he is very knowledgeable on the subject, thank goodness. He tends to focus on technology related businesses, which is okay, that's his interest. The majority of my classmates are over thirty (I am the youngest) which means I am surrounded by people who have much more life (and business) experience than me.
Our long term assignment over the course of the class is to create a business plan. This week we had to come up with the main idea and a one-sentence mission statement. Rather than creating a fictional business I decided to make something I will follow through with. I will let you know of my business idea in a matter of time, once it is more fully developed.

Arabic is awesome; the class is super fast paced. I love the sounds, the script and I have yet to learn about the different cultures in depth. My teacher is a very white woman in her thirties so luckily half the students in my class are native Arabic-speakers; and are there to learn to write (although I assume it's more about an easy A) which is great for us non-natives. We have learned to ask a selection of simple questions (What is your name? Where do you you study? etc.) and we are almost finished learning how to write the alphabet; a bunch of squiggly lines written in cursive from right to left. I have been practicing connecting random letters until we learn how to write actual words in Arabic script. We are assigned to read from the grammar book outside of school and I won't go into that subject. Arabic grammar is one of the most complicated things I have ever tried to learn, but I will get there.

So school is going well, I am having fun and life is grand.

-----------------------------

For those of you that didn't read my previous blog, I decided to try a new vegetable every week to keep myself cooking and experimenting with new things while the rest of my life is constant study.

This weekend I chose taro root or satoimo (the Japanese word, meaning "potato or starch root of the homeland"). This potato like vegetable is eaten all over East and South Asia and can usually be found in Chinese, Korean, Japanese and South Asian stores.

Compared to the white potato, taro root is lower in calories by weight and high in fiber; the outside is covered in small hairs similar to the coconut.
Caution: taro root is toxic if not cooked.

Simple taro root recipe

5-6 small to medium taro roots, peeled*
1/2 block firm tofu
1 C dashi stock (Japanese stock) - I didn't have dashi stock so I used water
2 Tbsp. white miso
1 Tbsp. soy sauce
1 Tbsp. maple syrup or 1/2 Tbsp. sugar (I used 1 Tbsp. brown rice syrup)

Cut the taro root into bike-sized pieces and put in a pan with dashi stock and sweetener. Crumble in the tofu.

Bring to a boil and cook down until the liquid is almost gone. Add the soy sauce. Thin out the miso with a little water until it become liquid rather than a paste, and add to the pan. Let simmer for a few minutes. Serve hot or cold.

Garnish with something green to perk up the beige.

*Some people with sensitive skin react to the slime of raw taro root and get itchy. If you want you can wear gloves or put the roots in the microwave for a few minutes before peeling. I decided to skip this and my skin was fine.

-----------------------------

This recipe was a little bland, due to my lack of dashi stock. If you wanted to add extra spices and forgo the dashi it would be very good, but it definitely needs one of the two. When eaten cold it has a similar texture to potato salad although the taro root has a slightly nuttier flavor than potato.
Next time I cook with taro root I will try something a little more traditional.

Until next time.

Goodbye Masalaama

Out in the world

2010-09-19T17:06:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends,

I am now 18 and living in Bothell, WA with my aunt and uncle until December when I move out on my own. I start school at Edmonds Community College (EDCC) tomorrow. I will be taking Small Business Management, Horticulture and Arabic.

I want to start writing blogs again to keep you all informed on my many tangents as well as to get my ideas out into the world.

One thing I will write about is my cooking. The other day I found an oriental-ish market by EDCC and I was blown away by the many fruits and vegetables I have never seen before. I decided that every weekend I will try cooking with a new kind of vegetable (or fruit). I will post the recipe I use, how it turned out, and a little history and culture surrounding that particular food.

I look forward to writing, sharing and creating.

Atmana laki kul Al Saada (direct translation: I hope you all happiness),
Twyla

Three weeks left of the adventure.

2010-05-13T08:59:00.000-07:00

First off, an update on the events of the last two weeks:

I stayed with my friend Mirjam in St. Georgen-Freiburg where I relaxed, walked a lot, went running, watched movies, ate good food, read and did art. I became friends with Mirjam's sister Almut, her brother Jan-Veit (pronounced Yan-Fite) and her mom Ute. I will miss them all dearly and I know I will return some day for an extended visit.
The weather for the first week was stunning and I had to go buy a pair of shorts. Then I went walking barefoot, got a blister and it got infected. The second week it rained, rained, rained, and I had to stay on the couch for a few days to let my foot heal.
I had a wonderful time and I wish I could stay a lot longer. But, Hungary, Italy and Sweden are calling. The loudest call comes from very far away, across the big waters in a place called Washington. Three weeks and I will be home.

In the meantime, I have had two days of travel. Celina and I left Freiburg yesterday. We had a rough start to our journey. We left the house at 5:20 and walked to the train station, one minute away. Seven minutes after the train was supposed to have come we checked the schedule and realized the early morning train only runs on Saturdays. Sometimes my planning skills are lacking. We had to walk/run to a tram stop about a mile away while the rain did a very nice job of getting us wet. Luckily we made that tram and arrived at the train station in time to buy tickets and board the train. The rest of the day was thankfully uneventful and we arrived in Bologna, Italy at 5pm. Then we took a bus and a train to Reggio Emilia where Daddy was waiting.
We had a wonderful dinner with our hosts, where my dad had been staying for the last two weeks. Home made polenta! Who knew. I am deffinetly going to make this when I get home.

4.12.10
Today we went to a nature reserve that our hosts own. We canoed 8km on a tributary of the Duna (Danube), played in the grass and went on two long walks.

4.13.10
We taught at the kids school today and now we are doing acrobatics and tricks with them. It is fun. But I am really really homesick and I wish we could fly home today.

Pictures will come soon.

time to move on..... another adventure awaits...

2010-04-19T11:36:00.000-07:00

I am starting to type as I watch my tomato sauce boil on the stove for dinner.
I have been living with the Morrison's in a big house in the Tuscon hills for one month. Although, it truly seems like I have been here longer. It is amazing how each day follows another and pretty soon thirty days have passed.
I am ready to go off on my own adventures again. I have been hard at work helping to take care of these wonderful kids. Of course, the hard work does not come without play.

I was hoping to have a lot of time to write a blog before I head off to Hungary. But, it is quite crazy around the house and I have not had time.

So, I will sign off with a promise to write a blog as soon as I can. I will be spending part of the day in Florence tomorrow and then taking a train to Bologna, another train to Forli and a bus to the airport. Then I will fly to Budapest. That is, if all goes well. The transportation is all crazy right now, due to the volcano in Iceland.

I hope to write more soon.......

the sun has come to stay!

2010-04-07T12:56:00.000-07:00

I figured it was probably time for an update. After all it has been nine days...
Sofia is thriving, not crying too much and bringing smiles to all of our faces. She will be two weeks old, tomorrow and she looks to be about three months. She is starting to lift her head and look around, especially when we are outside; she loves it outside.
The past two days have blessed us with beautiful weather. The sun is out, the birds are singing and the trees are in full bloom. I have spent the past two mornings reading in the sun, and this morning I was lucky enough to have a sleeping baby on my chest. The days are lazy. The kids started school today and it was great to have some peace and quiet around the house, if only for a little while. Mark made a wild asparagus omelet and I made a huge green salad for lunch. To that we added some of the best olive oil in the world and some sun streaming through the window.
The kids came home after school and the house erupted in sunlight chatter. I watched them play in the olive trees while I hung the laundry in the sun. Jake picked a handful of wild asparagus and Marina pretended Sofia's blanket was a baby.
After dinner the kids hopped in a bath and I read my book on the porch as the last rays of sun licked my toes.
Days like this make me realize how lucky I am.

Oh, and a little piece of exciting information! I am spending a month on my Grandma's organic farm (in Springfield, Pennsylvania) in September!

New Life

2010-03-30T13:20:00.000-07:00

The reason I have so many pictures is because my plan tonight, was to write a blog. Then Sofia woke up....... and plans changed. Because Kim is recovering, I am the one to attend to Sofia's needs at night. Tonight she told me with her crying that I was to burp her, change her diaper and rock her to sleep, please. So, the blog idea dissipated and I put all my attentions into this little girl.

I hope these pictures bring peace and joy to all who see them. This being is the newest of new life, an example of what we all used to be. She is beautiful. Holding her brings me peace, even when she only wants to cry.

I spent the last hour listening to her cry and she is finally asleep in my arms. I will take her back to Kim and then go to bed. Another fulfilling day awaits.

Springtime en Italia

2010-03-29T13:41:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was Sunday. Sunday the 28th. Day four of Sofia Anne Morrison's life in this world. As a present to mama and baby, we all (the rest of the family) took off to Montalcino (near Siena) and gave mama and baby a day of peace and quiet at home.
We were going to the birthday party of one of Jake's friends which was being held in his grandparents villa nestled in the hills of the most famous wine region in Italia. We, the American's, were the first people to show up, and we were an hour late. I guess Italian time is a little more developed than Island time.
As other families arrived, the father of the birthday boy prepared the outdoor oven for pizza baking. We spent the next few hours watching the kids play, helping to make pizza (with the freshest ingredients; they would never use grated cheese in Italy). Marco, the father, even made gluten-free pizza crust for us intolerant's; I guess I'm not really intolerant, but I am pretending for this month.
The food was delicious, and they even made gluten-free cake and cookies, just for us.
We spent the day sitting in the sun, watching the kids play in the olive trees, socializing and eating pizza made in the outdoor oven of an old, authentic, Italian villa.

Today is Monday, the first weekday of the kids Spring break.
Mark dropped Jess and I off in San Casciano on the way to dropping Marina off at her play date. Jess and I spent the day walking around the farmers market, jackets off, basking in the Italian sun. We ate lunch at a little pizza place (although we had pasta) which had very delicious pasta sauce. I like the way the pasta sauce here is not piled on in huge heaps; there is just enough to coat the pasta and the flavor is even better than anything I've had in the US. (They even take our package of gluten-free pasta and cook it for us!)
After lunch we had gelato, which I still hadn't tried for some reason. I had coffee. It was delicious, although I didn't find it any more amazing than most coffee ice cream. I guess I am just not a huge sweet person.
When we finished hanging out in San Casciano, we walked back to the house; which was no less than an hour trek along the narrow winding road through the Tuscan hills.

Aside from the beautiful weather and countryside and people; I am overwhelmed with children, and dishes and laundry. There is a constant stream of things to do and if there is a moment I want to sit down, Marina changes her mind about something and I have another thing to do. Marina threw a half-hour tantrum this morning (screaming, and laying on the floor trashing) because she wanted her chocolate, and we wouldn't give it to her. Don't get me wrong, she is a wonderful child; but the baby has changed something in her and just about every little thing brings on a tantrum. If she doesn't get what she wants she lets us know she's not happy. And the only way to teach her it doesn't work that way, is to ignore her, which means half the time she is around, we are listening to her scream. It is wearing all of us out. But, this is children, and this is the process. I am happy, I just am being given a lot of opportunities to breath.

A Beautiful Miracle

2010-03-25T12:53:00.000-07:00

At 5:32 PM on Thursday, March 25th, Kim Morrison gave birth to the most beautiful, precious, healthy girl!
I was in the bath with Marina and Jake during the birth, entertaining them so Kim could give birth without two other kids in the room.
It was a fast process; contractions started at 7:15 this morning and the midwives were here by 9 AM. She was only in hard labor for an hour before the baby made its appearance.
The whole family has gone to bed, but I am not tired. There is a pile of dishes and even more laundry to be done. Off to work and then to bed.

New life is a beautiful miracle.

Checking in....

2010-03-24T12:34:00.000-07:00

It has been a few days too long since my last blog. I have been incorporated into the life of this family, I have been busy with everyday things; everyday things made beautiful through the eyes of the kids.

In the past few days the baby has kept its safe home in Kim's womb (the due date was today), waiting until all of the sickness passes. Yesterday I got the sick bug that all the kids had, it started out as exhaustion; I thought it was from the Spring cleanse I am doing with Mark (more about that later). I went from being exhausted to having a stomach ache. I went to bed early, threw up an hour later (I guess you didn't really need to know much) and then slept the rest of the night. I woke up feeling great. The only reason I can think of that it would pass so fast is I take pretty good care of myself! Yea for good health!

About the Spring cleanse, it is a simple food cleanse to clean out the body. It is just Mark and I, Kim needs to feed the baby and the kids would never do something like this.
We are eating only raw fruits and vegetables with steamed rice for a week. (The night I was sick, we made an exception for steamed veggies because they are easier on the stomach.) After this week - which started on Sunday, the first day of spring - we will do two days of juice and then two days of water. Then another week of vegetables (this time with steamed), fruits, and rice to ease us back into eating normally. At first I though being sick was brought on by the cleanse, but not the case. So, we are going to continue with it. I feel really good about it. I am happy eating so many vegetables and it hasn't been too bad watching everyone else eat other things.

As far as life in general, I am extremely happy here. I feel like part of the family, and I am extremely excited to have a new being in the house; even if that means shorter nights and dirty diapers.

Ciao for now. Another update to come soon.

"Spring has returned, the earth is like a child that knows poems." - Rainer Maria Rilke

a lay low day

2010-03-20T15:01:00.000-07:00

Today was a movie day. Kim and Mark went out to have some alone time. I watched movies and played with the kids. And made cauliflower, green bean soup while listening to John Mayer.

I went on a walk with Mark and we stopped to meditate in the woods.

Marina is in the living room, playing and singing in Italian. It is precious. (I wrote this sometime in the mid morning.)

Mark’s smoothie and juice recipes are as follow. This is just a rough draft, they change every time.

Juice
1 cucumber
1 apple
some ginger
few stalks celery
two carrots
1 small-ish lemon
parsley (not normal, but if its there)
spinach, or something green
chili peppers occasionally (only a small amount)

Smoothie
arugula (marks favorite, but any green)
flax seeds
salad greens
cocoa nibs (tablespoon per person)
green powder
rice based amino acids (tocotrinos)
soaked almond (handful per person-ish) pumpkin and sunflower seeds
a little kefir
1 banana per person
roughly half the pitcher of water

I sat on the porch, drinking a bowel of chamomile tea and watching how the coconut oil from my lips made dancing spirals on the steaming surface. (I took a break after watching dishes and had to record this little detail.)

Tuscan Sun

2010-03-19T16:33:00.000-07:00

I woke up early again and made French toast with gluten-free bread, for the kids. After Jake and Marina left for school (Jess is not feeling good, so she stayed home) with Kim, I cleaned up the kitchen and headed out the door for a walk.

Within five minutes I had to take my jacket off. Sun in my eyes and licking my skin, I skipped through the olive trees and found a stream running in the valley. Along the paths, in the cracked dry mud, little wild flowers pushed their life into the world and I took on of each kind for a bouquet. Under the cover of the trees the birds sang and dogs barked in the distance. I came upon two deer that bolted at the sight of me and sent a commotion of wildlife flying and scampering in all directions. I was not going anywhere, not looking for anything; and I saw the beauty of the ivy on the trees when the sun shone its dappled rays though their leaves.
Wandering along the pathways I saw a broken down building foundation. The gray concrete walls rose only slightly higher than my head and lower in some places. The roof is missing and the doorway looks out over the stream in the valley. Inside, there are ivy, leaves, dirt and the old roof tiles: broken rubble. I started to clear out the tiles, stacking them on the side of the structure. Half buried in the moss, next to my pile of tiles, an old metal key, rusty and crumbling escaped into my hand. The rust took over so much that the key was no longer completely solid, although I didn’t want to try to break it, for fear that it would actually break. I placed it next to my bouquet of flowers and continued to clear the tiles from the inside. A little black scorpion cringed from the light when I unearthed its hiding place.
Whenever I go on a walk by myself I am going find my secret place and clean out the inside. Maybe it can be my place to meditate, be alone or read. And before I leave, I can bring the family down, with the new baby and we can have a picnic.

I drank Mark’s green juice and smoothie sitting on the porch in the cool morning air - overlooking the valley and far-off Tuscan hills. I brought a yoga mat out and did sun salutations to the sun.
When I went back inside, Mark suggested we do some yoga, but then Jake’s school called saying he was sick, so Mark had to go pick him up. Jess was in bed all day, and Jake has been in bed since he got home from school. Two sick ones and a baby on the way. Not the ideal situation, but hey, life goes on.

Mark and I finally got around to doing some yoga, which was just what my body needed; we ended with a few minutes of mediation. I don’t think I have ever been so relaxed in my life.

Lunch was almost entirely Italian: Prosciutto, ham, goat cheese, cucumber, olive oil mustard, and instead of bread, rice crackers. It was light and yummy.

Mark and I made gluten-free bread, for tomorrow. One loaf was with almond and flax seed flower and the other was with chestnut flower. They are sitting on the stove taunting me, but we are having them with dinner tomorrow night. I mentioned to Mark that one of my favorite breads is the fermented German schwartzbrot and we decided to experiment with making a gluten-free version sometime this month.

I went for another walk, with Marina this time. I carried her the whole way, but I was expecting that; and it just gives me a better workout. As we walked, Marina chatted about the wild boar footprints in the mud and we watched the sun lower itself toward the horizon in its golden glory.

With this weather and these surroundings, it is almost hard for me to be inside. I want to put my bed in the garden. But, I am sure that I would change my mind if I have the chance to move it there.

This evening, after dinner I sat down and gave Kim a foot rub with coconut oil. Marina wanted to help and she took on the job of massaging Kim's belly and the baby. I am so blessed to be part of this family right now.

I love it here, I love it here, I love it here!!

Simple Beauty

2010-03-18T15:21:00.000-07:00

Last night I arrived in Florence (Firenze), Italia at about 8pm. After twelve hours, six train switches and lots of sleeping Mark (father) picked me up and we drove the half-hour to San Casciano, a little hill-top town among the olive orchards and vineyards of Tuscany.
Everyone was asleep when I got there, so I was able call my mom and dad and tell them I arrived safely.
Kim woke up, due to the amazing being kicking inside of her womb. She is due on Tuesday the 23rd, but she is starting to feel little contractions and she expects it to come on Saturday or Sunday. Women are amazing.

Today was an exquisite day.
I woke up early to the sound of Marina (3) laughing with Kim. I made oat meal for the kids and had a glass of Mark's amazing green juice that he makes every morning. Kim and I got the kids out the door by 8:30 to go to school. I left the house with a sweater and my scarf! No jacket. It was a little nippy, but a welcome change from the freezing cold in Freiburg, Germany.

The roads here are narrow, winding pathways through the hills. People drive fast.
Jess (11), Jake (7), and Marina (3), all go to the same Waldorf school in San Casciano, although each building is in a different location in the town. The roads are barely wide enough for two cars and they winde in between houses, little shops and villas. Everywhere there are olive trees and grape vines and the air is fresh with spring.
After dropping the kids off, Kim and I went to a little farmers market and corner grocer to pick up vegetables. The woman at the corner grocer spoke very exited Italian to me, which was great, except for I didn't know what she was saying. Kim told me later that she was exited this baby is going to be born on Italian soil. How sweet.

When we drove back to the house to pick up Mark, we took ten minutes to have amazing smoothies he makes; once again, with nuts and greens, but also banana and fruit juice. They are truly the most nutritious things I have ever had in my life. I love them.

For a second time we left the house, but instead of driving into San Casciano, we drove through winding streets, up to a castle on a hill. This is where they go to do yoga every Thursday. A friend of theirs, Roberto, teaches just for the two of them. (Which is interesting, because they are both really good yoga teachers, themselves. But they are too overwhelmed getting ready for the baby.) We did two hours of relaxing yoga with heated floors, the windows open and the sweet trill of birdsong drifting in on the breeze. To end the session, Kim laid directly beneath a set of large metal chimes; and Roberto played beautiful melodies that made it possible to fall asleep with no thoughts tumbling around in my constantly contemplating mind.
We said our grateful goodbyes and walked out into the beautiful day. The sun was directly overhead - warm enough to feel the heat on my skin and bright enough to need sunglasses. Fat, fuzzy bumble bees paraded around the over-sized rosemary plants, the first creatures to get the nectar from the little purple flowers.

We drove from the castle-yoga studio to a little restaurant in San Casciano that has no name on the outside and no menu. It is owned by one family; the grandmother and grandfather are the cooks, the parents own it, the son serves and a close family friend helps out. It is personal, simple and some of the most delicious food I have ever had.
Mark, Kim and I sat at a little table surrounded by outspoken Italians, near the door that opened the the narrow street.
Before we ordered, Kim handed a pack of gluten-free pasta to the waiter. They are very happy to cook pasta especially for us, so long as we provide it.
First came salad. Mixed greens, as fresh as they come, drizzled with the best olive oil in the world and sprinkled with course sea salt. I don't even like plain olive oil in the US, but this stuff, I could practically drink. It has the flavor of the sun with a little kick of spicy green goodness. I had to close my eyes to fully enjoy this salad.
Usually soup is second, but the pasta was ready first, so... pasta came next. I had the spicy tomato sauce (one of the three choices) which was heavenly. The servings were smaller than in the US, just enough, not ten times a healthy amount. I don't think I have ever enjoyed pasta and red sauce so much in my life. (It also helps that the pasta was gluten-free.)
Lastly, we had soup. This was some kind of vegetable soup. It had a creamy, base, but did not seem like it was from dairy. I think it was from beans, cooked down to a delightful base. The main vegetable in the soup was a kind of large leafy cabbage, like a huge green flower in disguise. This soup, drizzled with olive oil was a soup for goddesses, and gods of course.
We walked to the car after lunch with smiling tummies and faces uplifted to the sun.

We dropped Mark back off at home on the way to pick up the kids from school. First was Marina, who ran to the car, displaying her rock treasures for the day. I was introduced to some of Kim's friends, the moms, who were asking how the new life in Kim was doing.
We went to Jake's school second and waited fifteen-minutes until the rush of children emerged from the building. During the cold, rainy, winter that wait would have been only tolerable. But the weather today was so beautiful that we sat with the windows open, talking, Marina playing on my lap. This is bliss. Nothing to do, nowhere to be, everything is relaxed and life is good. I talked briefly with Jake's teacher, who I had met on our last visit at Thanksgiving.
Lastly, we picked up Jess, after her piano lesson. Waiting in the car, at least four friends of Kim walked by the car with their kids. I love small towns sometimes.

When we got home I went on a walk with Jake and Marina, through the endless rows of olive trees. I carried Marina the whole way (which I really enjoy) while Jake ran ahead pretending to shoot pheasants and studying the tracks of wild boars. I saw a little lizard speed through the grass and up a tree. The sun shone and I had to take my sweater off. Sun on bare skin is one of life's many pleasures.

At the end of our walk we took a break in a patch of daisies to make daisy crowns and necklaces. When we entered the yard something caught my eye and we picked purple wild flowers for Mark, Kim and the baby.

I played with Jake's Lego's and drew with Jess. Then helped Kim make Caesar salad dressing from fresh olive oil, Italian Parmesan, fresh squeezed lemon juice and sea salt. I tried a bite and it made me sad I am not eating cheese.
Along with salad we had sticky brown rice and a beef stew with fresh vegetables, that Kim had made the night before.
It was simple, satisfying and delicious.

I read to Jake before he went to bed while Jess read to Marina.
My dad called shortly after Jake was asleep and he came out, complaining it wasn't fair that I was still up. So I laid with him while he went back to sleep.

Marina smiling into the sun with the daisy

crown I made her.

Today has been relaxing, rewarding, beautiful and nothing short of amazing.

And now.... it is time for bed.

I want to live here - 3.12.10

2010-03-14T06:23:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the lack of posts in the past week. We were without internet where I could hook my computer up. Now it is too late to write about everything that happened, so I am just going to skip it and move on. Hopefully I will be able to write more often, but I will be with a friend in Freiburg for the next three days and then off to Italy for a month, to take care of three children and a new baby. The blogging might by sporadic, but I will try my best to keep it up.

This part of Freiburg is called Vauban, you might have heard of it. It is known throughout the world for its unique layout and idea. About 5,000 people live here, all in apartments and flats; which are laid out along a central street. The street is special – there is a place for cars, a place for trams and a place for bikes and people. The best part is, the walking/bike part of the street is wider than the car part. Vauban is designed so that you don’t need a car; and if you have a car, you can only park along the center street or in one of two parking garages on the outskirts of the area. There are large bike spaces next to every building and almost every apartment has a yard. Large trees line the center street and communal gardens, play places, and grass fields are scattered among the buildings. The majority of the apartments are four stories high, although some of them on the outskirts, done by developers are one story higher. About eighty percent of the apartments were designed by their tenants (within a larger group), which makes most of the apartment buildings very different.
To read more about Vauban, go to this page or this page.

As a side note, I learned that in Germany they say, “Ameisen scheiße” when they take a picture, (like we say, “Cheese”) which translates to, “ant shit."

first day of dancing (3.8.10)

2010-03-14T06:10:00.000-07:00

The Family (from top left): Daddy, Lara, Tim-luca, Me, Celina, Sabine, and Claudio.

In the morning we went to the school in Mullheim and we taught the 8th and 7th (with some 10th) classes; we taught Cha-Cha like always.

After about three hours of teaching, one of the twelfth-grade students walked with us into town so we could go to the grocery store. They have a brand of yogurt here, that comes in a jar and is 3.8% fat. It is really delicious. I also bought some toothpaste because there is one brand, it comes in a red and white package, that makes my teeth feel like I just came from the dentist.

We had lunch at the school when we got back and one of the 8th grade girls walked with Celina and I into town a second time.

This time when we got back, I got to participate in Cloudio’s 9th grade fencing class. It is so fun! We just did exercises and then a little free fencing at the end. I want to take fencing when we get back to the States. Of course, I want to do that along with 1,000 other things, as well.

We (Daddy, Celina, Tim-luca and I) went on a walk in the evening, when we got home. It was freezing, but as long as you get your blood flowing it is okay. Tim-luca and Celina were playing the whole time; he is such a cute six-year-old. The little town they live in is nice, but it is funny that all the trees are pruned so they just have knobs instead of branches.

Claudio made a wonderful dinner of sautéed carrots with feta cheese, broccoli with sesame sauce, baked chicory with oil and vinegar and bread, butter, sliced meat and cheese. I was so happy to have a lot of vegetables.

After dinner I was very tired, so I went to bed early.

more dancing... and our evening party (3.9.10)

2010-03-14T05:58:00.000-07:00

We didn’t have to be at school as early as yesterday, so we lingered around the house a little longer. We started teaching with the 9th class, who have been learning ballroom dance for a few months now. We did Cha Cha like always and it went really well. After that hour-and-a-half we taught the 10th class. We had some of them yesterday with the 7th class, so we decided to do Cuban Salsa instead of Cha Cha. It was pretty difficult for them, but some of them got it and really enjoyed themselves. I don’t think we will do that again, though; something easier is a bit better.

We had lunch after that, which was interesting to say the least. It was like macaroni and cheese with bacon and applesauce on top. I sounds horrible, but at least it tastes better than it sounds.

After lunch we drove home and I am writing now. We go back to the school in a few minutes to teach the 9th classes dance group and then to have our evening party after that.

My dad was smart enough to leave when we taught the dance group after school; it made me have to speak. It ended up being really fun, I wish there was something like this on the Island. Maybe I have to start something.

Me and Tim-luca, Mr. Cutie Pie himself.

The evening party was a blast. I was just about the oldest kid there, which was okay. We did our usual World Of Salsa thing and then hung around afterward for a while. I got to dance with Tim-luca (our hosts son) and another little six-year-old girl. This just makes me more exited to go to Italy to take care of three kids and a new baby!

German lessons and fencing (nutze den Tag) - 3.7.10

2010-03-14T05:47:00.000-07:00

Today has been really wonderful. To start off the day, we had a delicious breakfast of soft-boiled eggs and schwarzbrot with cream cheese, horseradish, spicy mustard and lox. I didn’t even know I liked horseradish before this; I am going to make sure I buy some when we get home. The coffee was also delicious: strong, but mixed with warm foamy milk.

After breakfast I started a piece of artwork with a black pen, which makes me extremely happy, because it is the only way I can do art, other than the computer.

I made a bracelet out of pink yarn and tied it around my right wrist. It is my Push-Up Bracelet. Whenever I look at it I have to do five push-ups because I want to get back to being able to do 40 push-ups by the time we return home from Europe. It really helps, I think I have done at least 75 push-ups today.

At about noon we went on a walk with Serena, which was cold, but beautiful. The sun peeked its head from behind the clouds and the snow started to melt away, exposing the suffocating grass.

When we arrived back at the house, we got the whole family together to take a picture and then Cornelia, the mom, drove us to the train station.

From left, top: Daddy, Nicolas, Cornelia,

Celina, Me, and Serena.

The train ride was about an hour and we arrived in Müllheim/Baden, Germany where our host Claudio was waiting to pick us up with his son, Tim-luca, who is six-years-old and adorable. We drove back to their house and met Sabine, the mom and Lara, the 14-year-old daughter. We sat down together to have pineapple cake that Lara made; and coffee. Then we drove to the waldorf school to look around, make sure the sound system worked, and to do some sort of exercise.

We ended up fencing, because Claudio teaches PE and fencing is part of their PE, along with acrobatics. I love it! I want to take up fencing when we get back. Celina didn’t like it much; she said she didn’t want to hit me with a piece of metal. But I thought it was very fun.

After that we got a tour of the school, which is the nicest waldorf school I have ever seen. Then we went over to the teachers lounge to check e-mails because the Internet at our hosts’ house doesn’t work. (That is why this blog was not posted last night when I wrote it.)

When we arrived back at home we had the best tomato soup I have ever had and a salad of grated fennel root with olive oil, lemon juice and salt. Today was a day of good food!

After dinner I retired to the couch with Tim-Luca, Lara, and Celina and we read over a Lego magazine, learning the German words for everything. It was extremely fun and I can now count to one hundred, say the colors of the rainbow, and remember an assortment of other words. Tim-luca climbed into my lap at one point, which was very sweet. I am looking forward to spending a month with the three children and new baby in Italy.

Everyone is headed to bed now, we are leaving the house at 7:30 tomorrow to go and teach the 7th and 8th grades at the Freie Waldorfschule Markgräflerland (Free Waldorf School of something-or-other).

Snow in Kollmarsreute

2010-03-06T15:44:00.000-08:00

[Flashback to yesterday] After walking around Heidelberg a little bit and going into the Heidelberg Press building (which is very interesting) we bid adieu to our hosts and hopped on a train to Kollmarsreute, Germany. Really it was three train rides and a bunch of guessing before we arrived. Our hosts picked us up after I used a phone in a local flower shop to call and tell them we were waiting.
We had a delightful evening with Serena (the girl my age; her parents had a prior engagement) talking, eating and laughing over our German pronunciation.

Photos taken by my sister, Celina.

This morning I woke up to snow, falling steadily in the morning light. My first thought was, “NO……”, but that only lasted until I went outside and realized how beautiful it was.
Breakfast this morning was, you guessed it, bread and cheese. I have no problem with schwartzbrot (literally translated as black bread) because it is thin, filled with nutrition and yummy. I make sure to always have some of this bread with me. The thing that is hard is the toppings. This morning I had the choice of butter, cream cheese, cheese, marmalade, chocolate spread, hazelnut chocolate spread and erdnuss mus (or peanut mush). So, the options are either sweet or made from milk, both of which my body does not want. I am craving eggs or oatmeal or even yogurt (which I eat a lot in Europe because I don’t want to eat so much bread).
All of our hosts are off doing things at the moment so I spent most of the morning and into the afternoon, uploading pictures (which took extremely long due to my computers apparent disliking of Facebook) and learning how to use Freehand so I can do art on the computer. My sister managed to talk me into putting makeup on and going outside to model for her. She got a few good pictures before we started laughing and mascara started running in my eyes.

At one my dad, sister and I went outside for a little while and I admit, the snow is not as bad as I had thought. It is relatively warm and the sun made a special appearance; I almost felt like taking my jacket off. We didn’t stay out long because we wanted to wait to go on a walk until our hosts came home, that way we could all go together.
When our hosts got home we laid out lunch on the table. Guess what…. Bread and cheese!
Now I am sitting at the computer again, which is a rather silly thing to be doing all day, especially when I am in Germany. So, I think I am going to go for a walk or at least go do some push-ups.
We took a walk up into the hills at about five. The setting sun cast a dappled, rosy glow on the blanket of snow as it filtered through the trees. It is really beautiful here.
For dinner we had Knödel, a traditional German dish. It tastes like stuffing; I guess it is basically stuffing. But, it is formed into balls a little bigger than golf balls. They are very good. We had them with mushrooms. At dinner the conversation was about tongue twisters, which was thoroughly entertaining. In German one way to say, “I like you”, is, “Ich kann dich gut riechen,” The funny thing is the literal translation is, “I can smell you well."

Heidelburg, Germany...

2010-03-04T12:37:00.000-08:00

Looking out over Heidelburg from the front of the castle.

Our hosts here are a mother and daughter, Ute and Magdalena (13). We arrived last night at ten, after a two hour plane ride followed by a two hour bus ride. We talked until midnight and met their house rabbit which runs around like a cat. (Unfortunately, it pooped on my bed this morning, so I have to remember to keep the bedroom door closed in the future. Celina is sleeping there tonight, so it's okay. But, I guess I'm not that mean.)
This morning Ute had already left for work when we got up. Magdalena was kind enough to make breakfast before she left for school. I am starting to see the same problem we had when we were here last time. I have a hard time with the food: a lot of bread, not many vegetables and Nutella everywhere. The really dense, German bread is good though.
We left the house a little later than planned and walked toward where we thought the second hand store was, on the map. A kind American woman gave us directions and we found the store, in a little alleyway off the main road. Celina and I spent about two hours there, talking with the owner and trying on clothing. After that we walked down the walking street towards the castle. The weather was beautiful, although it was unbearably cold in the shade.
Along the walking street I saw three stores with clothing and things that really inspired me. All the clothing was from designers in Italy and Spain and it was bright, colorful and fun. There was also a kitchen accessories/random stuff store that had the most playful things I have ever seen. The problem with getting inspired on the road is that I am not able to make things; and the only time I seem to get really inspired is when I’m on the road. I think part of the reason is we get into such a rut when I am at home, I never get out and just appreciate my surroundings. I am going to keep that in mind for when I get back.
We walked up to the castle on the hill after my short burst of unquenched inspiration. It is a very impressive castle, with thick, red, stone walls but it would have been nice to have a local with us to explain the history. By 5pm it was getting very chilly, so we started our walk home.
One thing I have noticed about Europe is that everyone is out; there are bikes everywhere and people walking. I believe that is one of the reasons why there are very few overweight and obese people. The culture overall is healthier and more sane.
For dinner, Ute made a traditional German dish called senf eier, which literally translates to mustard eggs. It is like a soup, with halves of hard-boiled eggs and you eat it on top of potatoes. It was pretty good.
It is 8-o’clock and I am about to crash, so I think I am going to head in the direction of bed. I would like to say I am going to read my book, but alas, some silly boy I know turned me on to Lost and so I am going to give into the evil blue glow. At least I was outside all of today.

This doesn't feel like traveling...

2010-03-02T11:37:00.000-08:00

How strange, throughout the two plane rides I have still not felt that excitement of traveling. Landing in Amsterdam after a seemingly short, ten-hour plane ride, I don’t feel exited, I feel like this is an every day occurrence. We had a three-hour layover in Amsterdam, I was slightly tired, but it was about midnight according to my body, but sunny outside (about 9am in Amsterdam) so I didn’t feel like falling asleep. To get to the plane, we had to take a bus from the terminal. It was below freezing outside. I did not pack for this weather. By the time we got into the plane I was falling asleep on my feet. I spent that one-hour flight sleeping, not at all comfortably. When we arrived in Goteborg, it was noon, their time and 3am for my body. I was exhausted. Unfortunately, our hosts were not going to be home until 4pm, so we had to sleep on the benches in the terminal. I slept for maybe an hour but then one of the airport workers woke us up and made us move to another area. After that I couldn’t sleep. I walked around the airport (although, it was probably more like stumbling) and read a magazine until three, when we made our way to buy bus tickets. By that time I was so tired I couldn’t stand up for more than 30 seconds. Finally, we had our tickets and we went outside to get on the bus. It was FREEZING. The winter, all over Europe, has been unusually cold. There is about two or three feet of snow on the ground. We took two different buses to get to our host’s house and then walked a few blocks. Like always, we were welcomed into another wonderful family. Rune (born in the US) and Karen have two girls, Nora (6) and Sonja (3). They are adorable little girls.
I am sitting here at the kitchen table, writing this, while we all help to make dinner. I am completely exhausted, but I just had three cups of black tea, so I should make it through dinner. Like I said before, this doesn’t seem like traveling really, we are just part of the everyday lives of the people here.
I think part of the reason why I am not at all exited to be here is because I am so extremely tired. Tomorrow I am sure I will be a little bit more optimistic.
For now, good night…..
Tomorrow we fly to Germany.

Excitement is building

2010-02-28T14:03:00.001-08:00

Now that I had said my goodbyes to my friends on the Island, I am starting to feel more exited to travel. I am watching the big hockey game between the US and Canada with my grandma. Tess, my grandma is going down fast. We are having a bunch of family come today to say goodbye.
We have a 12:45pm flight tomorrow. We fly Detroit, then to Amsterdam and finally to Goteborg (Gothenburg), Sweden.

Don't give me the choice

2010-02-24T10:29:00.001-08:00

I talked to my dad the other night, about my reluctance to go back to Europe. He told me that I didn’t have to go, if I was really not feeling good about it. The problem is, now that I have the choice to not go, I have to make a decision. It was much easier to not have a choice. So, now I start to prepare. Five days until we fly out. Lots to do. Lots of people to say goodbye to. Luckily, it’s only three months. I don’t think I could go for any longer. But, I realize now, I am a little bit exited. What do you know.

reluctant farewells

2010-02-22T23:34:00.000-08:00

I am sitting here, tired, wanting to climb in bed.

We leave for Europe today-next week (that is my new way of saying it - if you don't understand, that translates to Monday) and I am really not looking forward to it. I am sad to say this, because I know most people would give almost anything to be in my place. But, that doesn't change my feelings. We have been back from our previous Europe adventure for three months. Enough time for me to get back into the swing of things. Enough time to get involved with a boy. And enough time to change my mind about traveling.
However, none of this is going to change the facts. I will still fly out with my dad and sister. Fly to Detroit, to Amsterdam and finally to Goteborg (Gothenburg). I know I will have a good time these three months. I know it will be fulfilling and wonderful and adventurous. I am just not exited... Funny how life works.

Good night... more to come....

A cornucopia of food

2010-02-04T16:24:00.000-08:00

Dear Reader,

      For those of you who are checking my blog to be updated about my travel experiences, hang in there. We (my dad, sister and I) are leaving Whidbey Island on the 15th of February. Celina and I will be spending the next two weeks on Vashon Island with some dear friends. My dad will be spending most of his time with his mom in Bothel, WA. We fly to Sweden on the 1st of March and we will, once again, be traveling and teaching dance for exactly three months. I will be writing my blog during our trip, just as last time; although, I will have my own computer so the updates will be more frequent. While we travel I want to explore what health means in other countries, but I will only write about that when I have enough time.

      Until March 1st, my blog will be about my exploration of health. The subject that has consumed the majority of my time lately.

I hope you enjoy,
Twyla

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      First off, I want to say that my very first batch of kefir came out wonderfully! Of course, because I was with my sister and mom it was gone in one setting. I like to drink it plain, it is like tart drinkable yogurt. It is also good with stevia, or concentrated fruit juice.
      This is a very easy way too add good-for-you enzymes to your life. All you need is kefir, milk (preferably raw; but, as long as it's not ultra-pasteurized it will work), and an air tight jar. Add the kefir grains to room temperature milk, filling the jar no more than ¾ full. Let it sit on the counter for 24 to 48 hours depending on the heat. (If it is summer time 24 hours will be the longest to let it sit.) Also, you can vary the culturing time depending on preference; for thinner, sweeter kefir take the culture out early and for more tart, thick kefir let it sit longer. Once the kefir is to your liking, sift the grains out (I use a plastic or wooden spoon with holes in it; never use metal) and place the grains in a clean jar. Just add more milk to the strained grains and the second batch is ready to do its thing. The culture will continue on for years (growing all the while) as long as you keep supplying it with new milk every few days.

      I also want to share with you my new favorite breakfast. I got it from Nourishing Tradition's (my favorite possession at the moment) which I am always consulting in the kitchen. This porridge originally called for oats, but one variation is amaranth which I was curious about trying. I will let you in on the recipe.

Breakfast Porridge
Serves 4

1 cup amaranth (or oats, kamut, spelt, or teff)
1 cup warm water plus 2 tablespoons plain, whole fat yogurt (kefir, whey, or buttermilk)
½ teaspoon sea salt
1 cup filtered water
1 tablespoon flax seeds (optional)

Mix amaranth with warm water mixture, cover and leave in a warm place for at least 7 hours and as long as 24 hours. Bring an additional 1 cup of water to a boil with sea salt. Add soaked amaranth, reduce heat, cover and simmer several minutes. Meanwhile, grind optional flax seeds in a mini grinder. Remove from heat, stir in optional flax seeds and let stand for a few minutes.

      I eat this with a dab of butter, a little milk and some agave. Sometimes I add raisins. Plain, amaranth is kind of nutty like quinoa. My favorite thing about the amaranth is the way it pops in your mouth when you chew. I have had this almost every morning for breakfast since I started making it. I know variation is better, but it is so yummy!

      Along the food train, I am soaking barley to make something I have not come up with yet. (We have a bunch of different grains and we are leaving Whidbey Island in ten days so we need to use up the grain.) Nonetheless, I am exited to make a mystery dish with the barley once it has sprouted.

      Yesterday I bought an organic, whole, chicken at the grocery store and decided to make some chicken stock so I can make red pepper soup this weekend. I have never worked with a whole chicken before, so being able to put it in a pot and boil with with some other ingredients is a total relief. I did take out the gizzard and liver, which leaves me the challenge of making something with them. I suppose the best thing to do is consult my lovely Nourishing Tradition's cookbook.

Chicken Stock

1 whole free-range chicken or 2 to 3 pounds of bony chicken parts, such as necks, backs, breastbones and wings
gizzards from one chicken (optional)
feet from the chicken (optional)
4 quarts cold filtered water
2 tablespoons vinegar
1 large onion, coarsely chopped
2 carrots, peeled and coarsely chopped (I don't peel them)
3 celery sticks, coarsely chopped
1 bunch parsley

If you are using a whole chicken, cut off the wings and remove the neck, fat glands and the gizzards from the cavity. By all means, use chicken feet if you can find them – they are full of gelatin. (Jewish folklore considered the addition of chicken feet the secret to successful broth.) Even better, use a whole chicken, with the head on. These may be found in Oriental markets. Farm raised, free-range chickens give the best results. Many battery-raised chickens will not produce stock that gels.
      Cut chicken parts into several pieces. (If you are using a whole chicken, remove the neck and wings and cut them into several pieces.) Place chicken or chicken pieces in a large stainless steel pot with water, vinegar and all vegetables except parsley. Let stand 30 minutes to 1 hour. Bring to a boil, and remove scum that rises to the top. Reduce heat, cover and simmer for 6 to 24 hours. The longer you cook the stock, the richer and more flavorful it will be. About 10 minutes before finishing the stock, add parsley. This will impart additional mineral ions to the broth.
      Remove whole chicken or pieces with a slotted spoon. If you are using a whole chicken, let cool and remove chicken meat from the carcass. Reserve for other uses, such as chicken salads, enchiladas, sandwiches or curries. Strain the stock into a large bowl and reserve in your refrigerator until the fat rises to the top and congeals. Skim off this fat and reserve the stock in covered containers in your refrigerator or freezer.

      I didn't have a large enough pot, so I used about half as much water as they called for. I hope it turns out. If anything, it will be more flavorful. I also didn't use feet and I think I put the gizzard in, although I am not really sure what a gizzard looks like, so it could have been the neck.... I'm not really sure.

Fresh raw milk

2010-01-31T12:56:00.001-08:00

My dad, sister and I went to Vashon Island yesterday to teach dance and visit close family friends. Because our friends (the McBrides) are into healthy, organic, sustainable food, a lot of the discussion was about my renewed interest in health. One of the topics that came up was raw milk and the benefits of culturing. Jim, the father, let my try some of the kefir he made from fresh cow milk they got from a friend. It was sour and delicious, and full of nummy enzymes. I immediately went to the farm where they get their milk and bought a half-gallon of fresh, creamy, raw milk. And, as a bonus, Jim gave me some of his kefir cultures so I can make my own! Here goes the beginning of, what I think will be, a long, joyful and hopefully whole life journey to health.

Health in a new light

2010-01-31T12:55:00.000-08:00

I have had a lot going on lately, health-wise that is. Last week, I had a meeting with Lynn Parr, a health coach and friend who has been in our dance classes on Whidbey Island. After our brief meeting she suggested I read the cookbook, Nourishing Tradition's: The Cookbook that Challenges Politically Correct Nutrition and the Diet Dictocrats by Sally Fallon until our next meeting. Coincidentally, I own this cookbook, because I requested it for Christmas last year; I never quite got around to reading it, until now. So, about a week ago, I picked it up and started at the beginning. The premise of the book is nutrition advice/information based on studies that the head honchos of medicine and nutrition don't really want people to know about; and recipes from isolated cultural groups all over the world. Groups of people who have no processed, artificial, pasteurized, hydrolyzed, or otherwise unnaturally altered food; who consume large amounts of animal fat, and who are extremely healthy and live without the modern complications of diseases such as heart attack, cancer and diabetes. If it were possible to be in love with a book, I am sure that is what I would be. This book is like nothing I have ever read and it has opened my eyes to a whole new way of thinking about food and ultimately, life. I recommend that anyone who has the slightest inkling to become healthier and more aware, read this cookbook.

At the beginning of my journey into health (in 7th grade) my goal was to lose weight. But, as I become more aware of my body and what I want for myself, I realize it is not about losing weight or being 'skinny'; it is about being healthy, embracing the body you are given, and treating yourself with respect and love. So, after picking up the Nourishing Tradition's cookbook and reading the first few chapters I am totally inspired. However, my inspiration goes farther than reading about health. I am in the first stage of changing my eating habits and what I have discovered is truly amazing.

My first example is B-U-T-T-E-R. For a lot of people, including me, butter, like most fat is scary. I have shied away from this highly nutritious source of vitamins, enzymes and healthy saturated fat because I thought, if I allowed myself to indulge I would become overweight. (I have always had an easy time gaining weight and because of that, I have always gone for low-fat, low-cal food.) So, reading the chapter on fats was a little bit of a rude awakening. As I read about the many benefits of butter and whole fat dairy products, a sense of content settled inside me; I realize now, that my years of pursuing good health have all been leading up to this time in my life.

I immediately started eating a little bit of butter every day and I have not eaten any 'low-fat' food for a week. I can't believe it! The results are amazing. I eat less, feel more satisfied, and am learning to embrace these wonderful gifts instead of being scared of them. I advise everyone to stop underestimating the power of butter. (Although, if you have access to it, pasture fed, raw butter is BY FAR the most beneficial.)

I had a second meeting with Lynn Parr two days ago that started another important process in my transition to a healthier me. We decided to focus in on improving the nutritional part of my health by making a short term, easy goal for the next week. I have been aware for a little while now that I eat from boredom, sadness, habit, and stress. Even if I am aware of this, I continue and ignore my body and my better judgment. Knowing this about myself, I wanted to make a goal that I would be able to stick to. Between the two of us (Lynn and I) we decided that for a few days out of the next week I would check in with my body before I ate anything, to find the reason why I was eating; and halfway through eating a meal I will check in again, to see if my body is satisfied yet. In essence, my goal for this week is to start the process of getting in touch with what I need to be healthy and vibrant. So far, two days into the experiment, I have been asking myself the reason for eating, before I start. It has humbled me and made it easier to eat only when I am hungry.

The beauty of libraries (and my newfound interest in facial masks)

2010-01-20T22:23:00.000-08:00

What happens to me, when I go to a library, is I walk out with at least twenty books. It was not just yesterday that it happened. Every time I go, that is the outcome. But I figure this is a really good disposition. It is so inspiring. This trip yielded a few different kinds of books: mostly natural home remedies, one on ayurveda, one on writing resumes, one on cooking with stevia, and one on green living. So, now I am spending my time pouring over beautiful collections of information that I am so eager to absorb.

I am modeling a honey, cinnamon, nutmeg facial mask

made the other night.

Picture and editing done by my wonderful little sister, Celina.

While reading some of these books I got the idea to do a face mask (that is the picture above) which is made from honey (a natural disinfectant), cinnamon and nutmeg. It felt absolutely scrumptious due to the warming qualities of cinnamon, although I don't know what other healthful benefits cinnamon and nutmeg have for the skin. This was last night.

Tonight, when I got home from visiting my lovely Mama, in Port Townsend, I made a facial of avocado (very good for dry skin due to loads of healthy omega-3's), plain natural yogurt (acts as a natural moisturizer due to enzymes and zinc and lactic acid), and honey. It felt a little weird, but it's what I expected. I had some left over and realized it is really delicious. I know, avocado, yogurt and honey doesn't sound all that appetizing. But, before you call me crazy, you would have to try it.

I want to do a different face mask every night. Too bad, my face would go all crazy if I did that and I would never know the effects of each separate mask. So, I think I will stick with the honey mask for the next month and use it one or two times a week. Towards the end of February I will evaluate how my skin is doing and post an update.

For the time being, I will stick with my routine of facial cleanser, witch hazel, moisturizer, and scylic acid, along with a honey mask a few times a week. Wish my face luck!

Procrastinating... and Broccoli Soup

2010-01-12T15:27:00.000-08:00

Last week, at our Thursday dance classes I was asked by a friend to make three purses (she want's to give them as gifts) by the following Thursday. Being my generous self I said, “Of course.” So, now that it's two days before I have to have them done, I am struggling to get myself off this computer and go work on purses. Somehow, our three month trip in Europe changed my priorities. All I want to do is read my new book (thanks to the thrift store) about at-home-natural-healing, research the healthful benefits of whole grains and, of course, make broccoli soup.

I got the idea for my soup on a blog I was reading yesterday, Gluten-Free Girl and The Chef. The blog entry was about broccoli and Shauna James Ahern (the woman writing the blog) asked people to comment with their favorite broccoli recipes. One woman commented that she liked to blend up cooked broccoli with a little bit of olive oil and salt and eat it like mashed potatoes. What a good idea! So, I tried it. But, I got stuck because the blender wouldn't work without some liquid. So I added milk and water and..... TA DA! Broccoli soup. Simple, yummy, nutritious. The perfect thing for a gray, rainy afternoon, when I should be sewing.

But, back to my habit of procrastinating. I don't know why I do it. I always have. I seem to work better when I have, say two hours, to finish a project that I could have done two weeks before. I know my body doesn't like it when I do that. I wipe myself out, get all stressed, and usually get a pretty great outcome for my project. Really it's not worth it. And yet it happens over and over again.

You are witnessing this problem of mine at the moment. I am typing this about my procrastination instead of getting the purses finished. But I really would much rather write and eat broccoli soup at the moment.

Thoughts on my future profession....

2010-01-10T20:33:00.000-08:00

While I was making collages yesterday, (out of old magazines) i found myself choosing the information, articles and pictures that related to health, well being and joy. This was not a new realization. About the time I started high school is when I became conscious of my overall health. (Before high school I was more focused on losing weight, which is still health, but a different tangent.)

But, yesterday I realized, 'Hey, I actually really like being healthy; I strive to be healthy in every aspect of my life and I want to share what I'm learning with others.'

It donned on me that becoming a health/life coach for people is just the kind of job I would love. I am approachable, outgoing and, most importantly, passionate about health. (I will say, I have one area I am lacking in; that is, getting enough sleep. But, hey, nobodies perfect.) This could be SO fun! I can see myself writing out meal plans, going shopping with people, and showing them daily exercises to get them moving.

In my practice (I don't think that's the right word, but I can't seem to think of another one at the moment.) I would not only include personal health; it would also be about healthy relationships and the world. I could get people recycling (and reusing), buying organic (and local), and being socially responsible by choosing companies who do good for the planet.

My first project; my cousin is a volleyball player and she is in better shape than 99% of the people I know. But, she has no idea the difference between home made bread (with five ingredients) and 'whole wheat' bread from the store (which has many ingredients you cannot pronounce and is usually dyed to make it brown). She asked me, the other day, to help her eat healthy. So, I have decided she will be my first project, so see if I like helping people get healthy. (She doesn't know about this idea yet. I only just came up with it last night.)

Homemade Soup Stock

2010-01-06T22:45:00.000-08:00

      After a Christmas dinner party my dad attended, he was sent home with the carcass of the Turkey. To you that might not sound exciting, but indeed it is. One of my favorite things in the cold winter months is home made soup and the only way to get really good stock is to make it yourself.

      This is even more exciting because it is just recently that I have gotten into cooking. My style is the, make-something-out-of-whatever-is-in-your-fridge style. So, I think I will be making a series of recipes that are simple to make and easy to alter, to accommodate whatever leftovers might be in your fridge. I'm not into gourmet French cooking; if that were my goal, I would have to dedicate the majority of my time to mise en place and braising. I make food that is healthy, light and simple enough for anyone to make. (Well... I guess you do have to be able to use a knife, an oven and a stove.) This is the beginning. I have never written down recipes for what I make. I usually cook creatively and am never able to replicate a dish. So, bare with me. I will catch on to the recipe-writer in me eventually.

Simple Soup Stock

      The key to a good stock is a generous carcass of a chicken or turkey (preferably free range and organic) and lots of simmering. If there is still meat on the bones, that is good, leave it, your soup will be more flavorful and have more protein. (1) Put the carcass in a large pot and cover with water. (2) Simmer with the lid on for as long as you have time for. I like to let it work its magic all day. (3) Refrigerate the stock overnight so the fat separates in a layer at the top. (4) In the morning, scrape the fat off the top and put take the bones out.

      At this point the stock is finished, do with it whatever you would like.

      Now, the task is to find the perfect soup to make with your delicious stock. I made up two different recipes in the past few days. The first one is a Simple Chicken Soup, which I served with Asian Green Pepper Salad (although I would probably pair it with something else next time). The second soup is Curried Red Lentil Soup, which I adapted from a recipe I found on the internet. I find that it is also wonderful cold, with extra sauteed onions on top.

This whole cooking/making recipes thing is pretty fun. Spread the joy. :)

Asian Green Pepper Salad

2010-01-06T22:13:00.001-08:00

Last night I was digging through the fridge to find something to pair with my Simple Chicken Soup. I found five different kinds of green vegetables and carrots. I started chopping. What I ended up with was this salad. I was not going for the Asian taste, but it needed something besides olive oil and vinegar (that's ALWAYS what I use for salad dressing) so I looked in a box of food and the sesame oil grabbed my attention. Perfect solution. It turned out great, although I probably wouldn't pair it with chicken soup next time. It was kind of a weird combination. But hey, those are the things that make life fun.

This is a light, yummy, Asian inspired salad that would be good paired with a number of Asian dishes as well as eaten on its own.

3 green bell peppers, chopped
6 stalks celery, chopped
1 large carrot, grated
1 or 2 avocados, chopped
1 Tbsp salted or toasted sesame seeds
Sesame oil
Olive oil
Balsamic Vinegar

Toss the first five ingredients in a bowel and drizzle with sesame oil, olive oil and balsamic vinegar. Make sure to continue tasting the salad as you add the dressing to get it just right for your taste buds.

To make this into a one-dish-meal, add some chicken, tofu or a can of white beans.

Simple Chicken Soup

2010-01-06T22:08:00.001-08:00

My simple chicken soup is nothing extravagant or overwhelming, but it is comforting in it's simplicity on a cold winter night.

6 or 8 cups Chicken or Turkey Stock
1 large white or yellow onion, chopped
4 large carrots, chopped in rounds
5 celery stocks, chopped
salt and pepper to taste
Chicken or turkey pieces (optional)
¼ C brown rice (optional)

1.In a large pot combine all ingredients, excluding salt and pepper. Simmer for up to two hours, with the lid on. (If the lid is off, the soup will evaporate and you will be left with much less than when you started.)

2.After simmering for two hours add salt and pepper to taste and simmer for another hour.

3.Serve as a starter or light meal (if you added Chicken and rice). Enjoy!

Curried Red Lentil Soup

2010-01-06T22:01:00.001-08:00

I adapted this recipe from a lentil soup recipe I found online. It makes a high protein meal and is great paired with a salad.

1 C lentils
1 medium onion, chopped
¼ C rice
1 tsp curry powder
soy sauce to taste (about 1 Tbsp)
6 C chicken broth
1 small onion chopped
2 tbsp oil

In boiling chicken broth, simmer lentils, onion, rice and curry powder for one hour. Fry small onion in oil and add to soup, along with soy sauce, just before serving. Enjoy.

A New Year

2010-01-06T11:00:00.000-08:00

I just realized, even if no one reads it, I love writing a blog. I love sharing my thoughts, discoveries, experiences, and crazy notions with the idea that someone somewhere might be reading what I write with a smile on their faces.
On New Year's Eve I wrote a list of ten things I wanted to keep in mind for the year; not resolutions, but just things to keep in mind. Here is my list:

Be open to anything. (I have a pretty easy time with this one already, but a reminder is always nice.)
Nourish your friendships. (When I get too anvolved in any one thing – a boyfriend, for example – I tend to neglect the people I am close too.)
Don't let fear stop you.
Smile and play. (I don't usually need reminders, but I often tend to be the 'grownup' among my friends.)
Learn new things. Explore. (Before we left on our first Europe Trip, I knew, pretty much, what I wanted to do in the future. When we got back, I had no idea. I want to try all the world has to offer for me, this year.)
Take one picture every day. (When I thought of this idea it had no guidelines. Now, I have decided to take a picture of my hand every day. So, far I have stuck to it. Five days.)
Love yourself. (It seems that people are always going for this goal. I want to love myself with enough exercise, nourishing food, good relationships, enough rest and by doing things I love.)
Bring beauty into the world in whatever way you can. (To me, doing art, caring, and even writing this blog are ways to share happiness and beauty into the world. But I am on a search for even more ideas.)
Explore independence. (I will be 18 this summer. I am itching to be on my own. This means a well, paying job, but not just a job for money, a job that fulfills me. It also means taking care of everything myself and stepping into the world as an individual.)
Carpe Diem - Sieze the day. (As I plan things for following weeks and the rest of the year, I want to keep in mind: the most important moment is now.)

Carpe Diem

...learning to do nothing.

...Izmir.

...living with the Turkish bureaucracy.

...craving sugar.

...a salad.

...mutlu yillar.

...unusual Christmas.

...yağmur yağıyor.

...Konya.

...brain overload.

...a special post.

...stairs with a view.

...all or nothing.

...the joys of a shared apartment.

...maybe I'm crazy?

...a little more clarification.

...lost beauty.

...life as a Western woman.

...my day.

...song in the streets.

...at the airport.

...I haven't found it yet.

...another big city.

...I like this city.

...a hike in New York.

...my new friend Timothy.

...a lot of water.

...goals.

...food and other preoccupations.

...my first time on Grandma's farm (and the culmination of a cross-country road trip.)

...voyage.

...life IS good.

...just do it.

...a poetry game with friends.

...walking, walk, walked.

...and sometimes *life intervenes*.

...all the time in the world.

At the forge and anvil

Being true to myself

Trusting.

A recipe for myself

The first snow

Tri-National US Servas Convention

Loving school (New vegetable: Taro root)

Out in the world

Three weeks left of the adventure.

time to move on..... another adventure awaits...

the sun has come to stay!

New Life

Springtime en Italia

A Beautiful Miracle

Checking in....

a lay low day

Tuscan Sun

Simple Beauty

I want to live here - 3.12.10

first day of dancing (3.8.10)

more dancing... and our evening party (3.9.10)

German lessons and fencing (nutze den Tag) - 3.7.10

Snow in Kollmarsreute

Heidelburg, Germany...

This doesn't feel like traveling...

Excitement is building

Don't give me the choice

reluctant farewells

A cornucopia of food

Fresh raw milk

Health in a new light

The beauty of libraries (and my newfound interest in facial masks)

Procrastinating... and Broccoli Soup

Thoughts on my future profession....

Homemade Soup Stock

Asian Green Pepper Salad

Simple Chicken Soup

Curried Red Lentil Soup

A New Year

...and sometimes life intervenes.